Ozzfest at Nissan Pavilion

The Haunted

There’s a time and place for everything…and eleven o’clock on a Sunday morning doesn’t make us think about metal, ordinarily. Perhaps that harms our cred, but that’s the facts. The Haunted performed a hell of a set (no pun intended) to the hearty and faithful that made it out to see them at their unfortunate time slot. Hailing from Sweden, a country we suspect is less hung up on Sunday morning ritual, The Haunted is comprised of seminal dark-metal geniuses Jonas & Anders Björler and Jensen of At the Gates, Peter Dolving, a howling mad one-man maelstrom, and Danish drummer Per Möller Jensen. We had the opportunity to meet and converse with the band after their set, and are not exaggerating when we say that they were the kindest, friendliest people we met all day. Sharing one’s personal stash of bottled water on a scorching day has that effect on people...

Rob Zombie

We were concerned that Zombie would rely too heavily on prerecorded sounds and loops to recreate his studio-honed electro-metal sound and come across like a grizzled Ashlee Simpson. We were thrilled to be wrong. There were definitely prerecorded sounds as part of the mix, but Zombies’ bassist, guitarist, and drummer were solidly on point and in control the whole time. Zombie himself mastered the stage space, whipping his shaggy locks and leaping wildly like a practiced master. His banter was funny and just hedonistic enough. Rob and the band hit all the crowd pleasers, including a triple-speed "ThunderKiss ’65" from his White Zombie days and the ever-popular "Living Dead Girl" and "More Human than Human". The whole crowd shouted every word, cheerfully flailing in a sea of white, sunburnt fists. Even the bouncers got into it, cheerfully escorting happy crowd surfers out while mouthing the words and smiling. The high point for us came when the band covered the James Gang’s "Funk #49" as Zombie punted promotional beach balls into the crowd.

We would have whipped our tops off to join the co-ed topless mosh pit, but as nerdy bloggers, we were worried about losing our glasses.

Iron Maiden

We must confess that we are not old-school Maiden fans, as we were so terrified of their album art in their heyday that we could not enter the bedrooms of our friends’ older brothers or look at certain ads in
Thrasher magazine. But one didn’t have to be an old fan to appreciate the band’s performance. Checking in with easily the most elaborate stage set at Ozzfest, ‘Maiden featured a rotating series of
hand painted tapestries featuring Eddie for each song, a red-eyed demon that rose in a puff of smoke to coolly supervise crowd and band alike during "Number of the Beast," and a hulking giant Eddie
that came out onstage and flailed the arms of his straitjacket for a bit.

Without all of these stage tricks 'Maiden still would have owned the show... singer Bruce Dickinson sprinted and leaped about the stage like demon-fueled Austin Powers. His enthusiasm and energy were completely infections, and you couldn't help but smile at this guy, old enough to be our fathers, hitting high notes at a full
sprint while wearing shaggy leather chaps. Their show was equal parts hilarious, inspiring, and heavy. Diehard fans will be thrilled to know that all of Iron Maiden's set comes from their first four albums, and all of their past guitarists appear onstage together.

Black Sabbath

We wouldn't say that Sabbath was terrible, but they were a distinct letdown. Our uncle saw them tear his college's gym apart in the 70's, and we were secretly hoping they still had it. Not so much, unfortunately. While we have no specific complaints about the performance, the feel was just so eh. Tony Iommi and Bill Ward still have their chops, but seem so workmanlike in their delivery that it's hard not to imagine them imagining the brand-new fleet of helicopters they'll be able to purchase after the ticket money rolls in. Ozzy sounds fantastic and looks terrible. His movements on stage are lilting and puppetlike, as though he is controlled by a team of distracted puppeteers. While it sounds like classic metal to see a show performed by a cackling, drug-addled madman in black pajamas, the reality falls somehow short. In concert, Ozzy does this weird modified jumping jack during all the instrumental parts to try and get the crowd to clap. Clapping at a Sabbath show is like tagging the wall of a NASA wind tunnel, and while it's fun, it's really pointless.

However, we did remove our earplugs for the full sonic boom of the song "Black Sabbath", and it blew our cynical little doors off. We did not, however, feel too busted up about splitting during Paranoid to get a jump on the inevitable post-concert parking lot traffic jam.