February 28, 2006
Muzak No More? (Updated)
Leave it to the caffeine-infused minds of Seattle to come up with the answer to our dial-in woes. According to Governing Magazine, Seattle residents will no longer be subjected to Glen Hollis' rejects when they make a call to city hall.
A new program called OnHold replaces synthesized easy listening with a selection of local musicians. The playlist of 11 bands from different genres is updated every few months. What's better is how the new program prompts people to visit a website, where podcasts featuring the bands are available for download (as are, of course, links to buy their wares off of Amazon or CDBaby). And, proceeds from said sales go towards funding local arts education! Seattle, what will you think of next? As if the Space Needle and Nirvana weren't enough.
So far no other cities have picked up on this truly great idea, so we say, come on down to D.C., OnHold! Wouldn't you like a little Shortstack with your inquiry? A little Hello Tokyo before you hear "hello?"
Update: Oops. It seems there is a company out there that goes by the name "Muzak," and they didn't appreciate our innocently using it in the title. They write:
...the use of our company name in the title is incorrect and constitutes brand infringement of a trademarked brand. We would appreciate a published correction and clarification, and next time someone puts you on hold to annoying music, don’t jump to conclusions. That’s not Muzak’s game, and your publication should know better.Huffy much?
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NO! DC can't take this (dis)service. I mean our indie rock, "punk" (it's not punk like the east bay is punk), hip-hop/rap, and electronic/dj scenes are ok. But you know OnHold would merely assault our ears with DC's own genre...one that is too cacophonous to play anywhere else: GoGo. Please keep this talentless, beat-barren, nonmelodic, and unoriginal bongo shit from ruining another second of silence! I've become so numb...
You'd think people would've gotten over making lawyery threats against websites by now. Lowtax has made quite a show of his back and forth (NSFW language) with these non-lawyers who like to bandy about legal phrases.
It's not just that there happens to be a company named Muzak, that's where the term came from. They're actually a pretty big company. I see their vans around town. They used to be known for rerecording pop songs in a cheesy manner for elevators etc. Hence the equating of Muzak and elevator music to cheesy and bland music (when's the last time you heard music on an elevator anyway?). But I think nowadays they have a broader range of music (hence the dude's sensitivity on the music quality issue).
They have to protect their trademark or they risk losing it, although this may be unnecessarily aggressive. They probably hire someone to run Google searches every day and send out the same email (probably approved by their attorneys, notwithstanding Ike's comments).
I call bullshit. Muzak's marks are registered for things like music, telephone services and such. No one would think that you are selling muzak. No question that it is bad for the muzak brand if you acknowledge that their music is lousy (I don't like their music). That doesn't mean they have a legal right to sue you. I think that there is a strong argument that Muzak's marks are not legally famous, and they have no business bothering you.
Basically, Muzak screwed up because they did not establish a generic term for their product. Thus, like rolodex and kleenex, it is in danger of losing its distinctiveness.
a) Trademark protectors don't seem to worry all that much about whether a usage is "infringing" or "non-infringing," they just don't want you to use their registered mark to describe a more generic (and in their eyes, "undesirable") product. You could get one of these letters in the past for referring to generic tissues as Kleenex, and I'll bet Xerox still sends them out when people use "xerox" to stand in for "photocopy." Muzak wants to be associated with their actual product, not just with any syrupy, annoying elevator/hold music you hear.
b) The title of the post was "Muzak No More?" No corporation likes to see a headline that implies, however uninentionally, that they're going out of business, or losing market access. Over-protective? Yes, but not bizarre or incomprehensible.
Yeah Nate's right. It doesn't matter whether they'd win a lawsuit against DCist. They have no interest in bringing one. But what they do want to do is to be able to sue some other company that starts offering phone services with "Muzak". If they don't make an effort to prevent the term from becoming a generic reference to cheesy music, then they risk losing that lawsuit, which would be catastrophic for them.
I would dispute that Muzak has screwed up. They probably do have a generic term for their services. I'm sure it's called something like Muzak sound environments or something. It's not screwing up when you have a brand name as strong as Muzak, or rolodex, xerox etc. It's actually quite a rare success. But to protect that success they have to protect their brand. Whether it means firing off a missive to every blog that uses the term generically is debateable, but it's probably supportable.
When I saw the headline, "Muzak No More?" and saw that it was about Seattle I initially thought Muzak, a Seattle company, was going out of business. The article wasn't about that but still.. some people might have read the headline, said "what a shame" and continued onward.
Read J. Lanza's _Elevator Music_ for a great history of the company and its science.
I assumed that Muzak's formula of making less obtrusive versions of recognizable hits was sort of outmoded by the CRAP THAT SPILLS OUT OF MY RADIO EVERY DAY. But hey, maybe there's enough room in that detestable market for anyone who wants to join.
couple things..
-Seattle's On Hold is available as a podcast
-Muzak is a company based in Seattle
-Muzak has a tendancy to nastygram blogs that use the term 'muzak' - I think I remember it happening to boingboing and they had the same response as you
Not only is there a company called Muzak which is legally required to jelously protect it's name, but it even has a Seattle connection. Although it's moved on to other climes, the company was headquartered in Seattle in the 80s and provided jobs for more than a few of the struggling musicians of the day who were trying to create their own kind of distinctly different music.
In fact, there's something about this place that seems to encourage background music hereabouts. Another company called AEI (which has since disappeared into the merger maws to become a small part of DMX Music) created a slightly different form of processed music. They're mostly still notable for some interesting statues they left around, including one of Jimi Hendrix in front of their office/production building on Seattle's Capitol Hill.