May 8, 2006
Something Wicked This Way Comes
Washington has become all the rage in the Hollywood set; whether they're trying to establish their public policy bona fides or soak their late husbands for millions of bucks, the beautiful people (and Michael Douglas) have been showering the District with unprecedented favoritism. So I suppose it should come as no surprise that the strangest and most untentionally hilarious of movie star trappings, the Church of Scientology, should be doing a booming Washington business.
So much so, in fact, that the church appears ready to expand beyond its current headquarters in the city. According to the Washington Business Journal, growth in the church, which we presume is due to Tom Cruise's bizarre ravings and terrifying impregnation of Katie Holmes, has pushed traffic at Fraser Mansion, the current Washington center for the church, beyond what the north Dupont building can handle. Last November, an organization connected to the church purchased a 50,000 square foot building on 16th Street in NW, just north of Scott Circle, which should be a functioning church property by the end of this year. The Journal notes that the acquisition will make D.C. the "third-largest collection of Scientologist facilities in the nation, in terms of square footage, behind Los Angeles and Clearwater, Fla."
Plans for the new building include a large auditorium and a rooftop cafe. DCist also speculates that the building will house a secure library for the religion's sacred texts, a silent birthing room, lots of inscrutable shit, and a large vault for money swimming, because good lord that church has a lot of money. And maybe a mind control laser of some sort. We're just guessing; we're glib.
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DCist also speculates that the building will house a secure library for the religion's sacred texts
A secure library? Meaning those first-edition copies of Battlefield Earth will be behind bulletproof glass?
When did it become so cool to rip on scientologists? I'm so sick of people talking trash about Tom Cruise, John Travolta, Katie Holmes, etc. I would LOVE for you all to start ripping on jews and catholics too because in all honesty, every religion has its own retarded practices and followers. Can't use electricity on Saturdays (or is it Friday)? Have to drink wine at church and pretend it's Jesus' blood? Stand up, wave your hands, sit down again, bow your head, sing a song, praise Jesus....amen! I personally think the whole alien thing is just as believable.
They might even build a really large oven for making chocolate salty balls.
TC
Sounds like you could use a stress test.
Sounds like you could use a stress test.
When did it become so cool to rip on scientologists?
When Tom Cruise began acting like a freak? If scientologists don't like the way they are represented in public then they might want to consider a getting a new spokesman.
TC
JF, I can understand your position, but I think there are real differences between the CoS and established religions. Mainstream religions typically include non-destructive moral systems; they ask for money, but not to the point of financially destroying their adherents; they don't pursue vendettas against reporters and apostates; they do not interfere with the administration of life-saving medical care; and although you may think they are mistaken, their leadership and founders believe sincerely rather than intentionally trying to deceive (there's good evidence that Hubbard knew he was spinning lies, at least at first).
And it's also worth noting that most religions' charitable outreach is focused more on charity and less on proselytizing than the CoS's programs -- and they don't try to cover up their affiliations the way CoS and Narconon do.
I understand that you don't like organized religion, but you're wrong to simply write them all off as equivalent. Crusades, the Inquisition, sure -- terrible. But in the *modern era* there are few religions doing more deliberate evil than the Church of Scientology.
If you're interested, there's a lot of information available at xenu.net.
....But in the *modern era* there are few religions doing more deliberate evil than the Church of Scientology......
Um, ever hear of a little place called Saudi Arabia where a woman is beaten for having the AUDACITY to drive a car without a man's permission? now if she is driving without a man's permission AND showing a little ankle, god help that woman because all hell will be rained down on her in the name of religion.
Let's distinguish between religious doctrine and state-sponsored bastardization of that doctrine in the name of societal control, shall we? Granted, that includes the King James edition, but that's a healthy thing to recognize.
Key difference between Scientology and other religions:
Most religions don't charge money for enlightenment. Last time I checked Bibles, Korans, Torahs and almost any other religious texts are practically given away. Nobody ever charged my family for catechism. Auditing to make it to the rank of Starfleet Captain or whatever the system is now requires many thousands of dollars. Don't believe me, check Operation Clambake/Xenu.net.
TC:
Who cares if Tom is their spokesman? He's not actually, he's just an actor who believes in one of many crazy religions. Is it that much different that people invading the middle east to spread freedom, er, I mean christianity, er, I mean to get some oil fields and piss people off? People just like to jump on the Tom Cruise ripathon bandwagon so they have something to talk about at a party. I personally like to rip on Gwenneth Paltrow for naming her kids after round fruit and ancient magicians.
Tom:
Thanks for the link to learning more about a pointless religion, but I know all I need/want to know about scientology. It's dumb, and so are ALL other religions. But you know what? People (other than me) like believing in something and being a part of a group so either rip on all of them or leave them all alone.
Wow..."Something Wicked This Way Comes?"
While I do think that Scientology is unusual, a little scary, and definitely not for me, I would never label it as "wicked." No matter how bizarre or different it is to most of us, it is a religion/belief system, and to call it "wicked" is a pretty ignorant, ugly insult.
Many of us believe in a man who walked on water and rose from the dead. That's pretty weird. Maybe to others, that's "wicked," too...right?
Well, I did say few. And I really don't want to get into the pros and cons of Islam. I don't know enough about the relationship between the religion and Sharia law.
Check out Scientology's explicit policies on how you're allowed to treat "suppressive persons". It may not have the headcount yet, but it can give any religion out there a run for its money in sheer awfulness.
Yes, yes, but the real question is:
Will Scientologists be allowed to double-park?
Only if they're from Maryland or Virginia.
"Many of us believe in a man who walked on water and rose from the dead. That's pretty weird."
Whoomp, there it is! Don't forget about the people who believe that cows are sacred.
PS - Anyone who actually thinks that George W Bush is a born again christian must also think that Ross Perot has tiny little ears. Bush is as religious as Andrew Dice Clay.
No matter how bizarre or different it is to most of us, it is a religion/belief system, and to call it "wicked" is a pretty ignorant, ugly insult.
Suggested Google search terms:
- Lisa McPherson
- Quentin Hubbard
- Elli Perkins
- Suppressive Persons
Let's not throw around the term "ignorant" without actually being sure that the person of whom you're speaking is less informed than you.
There are plenty of kooky cults out there (e.g. the Raelians) that manage to go about their flying-saucer business without psychologically devastating or killing anyone. Scientology is not one of those cults.
For those of you who use sites like Xenu.net to get your information on Scientology, don't pretend you are using a good source. That's like claiming that Fox News is the best place to find out about weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.
I have it on good authority that Andrew Dice Clay is is a practicing Muslim. Along with his brother, 'Cassius' Clay, he found Allah, changed his name to Muhammed and has most recently put out a fatwa against fellow comedian Steve Harvey for starring in terrible sitcoms. All true.
I don't know of many people who actively mock Scientology (other than the folks at Operation Clambake); most who chuckle at it tend to focus on one of two things. First, people gravitate towards the empty, soulless celebtrities who follow it and issue utterly inane, bizarre statements which are attributed to their religious choices, such as claiming a full knowledhe of psychology. Second, it's the fucking thetans and other pseudoscience claptrap.
Don't want to be mocked? Don't believe in garbage.
Brap! has a point. Believing in garbage will get you mocked in public everytime.
JF - I get that you don't believe in what you can't touch or see. Lots of people are like that. It's okay with me and I promise to never rip on you for that as long as you can promise to not rip on me for believing in a guy that could walk on water 2000 years ago. Fair enough?
TC
TC:
This has nothing to do with you or me. I'll rip on you all I want because you're weird.
My original point is that people seem to think it's cool and justified to rip on scientology because Tom Cruise jumped on a couch, taught Brooke Shields a lesson, and knocked up Katie "Droopy Eyes" Holmes. Big deal. Find something more worthwhile to rip on, like Britney Spears being butt f*ing ugly (and talentless) or Kiefer Sutherland's conversion from trailer trash to a sex symbol. Didn't he used to have a rat tail?
JF,
You're obviously just reading the wrong blog if you think it is more interesting to read about and discuss Britney Spears' looks than the fact that a religious organization is growing in number based on its crazed-celebrity following. Why don't you try www.idontlikeyouinthatway.com instead?
Not a lot of Bradbury or British Sea Power fans out there, eh?
I wish British Sea Power's last record had been better. Naturally, I blame Xenu.
I reserve the right to mock, rip on, ridicule and/or demonize any dangerous cult. There's nothing more worthwhile to rip on. When Scientology stops ruining lives, I'll stop ripping on them.
You are so right Robis! I've been saying the same thing about groups like this for millions of years. Who do they think they are! They are weird and bad!...........(I reserve the right to poke fun at peabrains)
20+ posts before someone got the BSP connection? For shame.
This article by L. Ron Hubbard Jr. about his father definitely opened my eyes up to this "cult/religion."
http://www.rickross.com/reference/scientology/scien240.html
Please, please read it if you have time.
Points brought up in article:
"1) ..at six years, a vivid scene of his father performing an abortion ritual on his mother with a coat hanger.
2) He started me out by mixing phenobarbital into my bubble gum, when I was ten years old. This was to induce deeper trances in order to practice the black magic and to get an avenue to power.
3)The proper term would be "soul cracking." It's like cracking open the soul..
4)But he beat up a lot of women very badly. Blood, black eyes, busted teeth, the whole thing. "
By "the BSP connection" you really mean the Ray Bradbury connection, right, since he wrote the novel titled Something Wicked This Way Comes over 40 years before BSP wrote "Something Wicked"? Or maybe you mean the connection to William Shakespeare's Macbeth, since that's what both Bradbury and BSP were quoting . . .
Based on their construction record in Clearwater FL, if the CoS says that their new building will be operational in November, they mean November 2028.
And if Fraser Mansion is over capacity, is "capacity" three people or something? I never see anyone going in there, and only see two or three people on the balcony sometimes.
does this building on 16 st have off street parking?
I think we need to go torches-and-pitchforks on these weirdo fucks before they reproduce. Then we can get to the Baptists churches. Straight white people, you're next, unless you start moving back to ... whereever it is you lived before gay white men caused this real estate boom
I hate everyone not like me. Well, hate's a strong word. How about "would rather not have to live around". I think it's a valid way to live, because I see other people living that way all the time.
This comment post has been my RALLY FOR RELIGIOUS FREEDOM!
dorkb0t, stop giving religious freedom a bad name.
Based on their construction record in Clearwater FL, if the CoS says that their new building will be operational in November, they mean November 2028.
And if Fraser Mansion is over capacity, is "capacity" three people or something? I never see anyone going in there, and only see two or three people on the balcony sometimes.
Yeah, I'd take Scientology's claims of "sudden growth" with a few grains of salt. Their M.O. seems to be to project strength and success in hopes of a self-fulfilling prophesy. They're all media strategy, all the time.
Their presence in Hollywood is about a desire to associate themselves with popular culture's leading lights. (It's a questionable strategem, of course, considering that it seems to involve turning said leading lights into raving loons with no box office draw.)
But, considering that they can always just use their slave labor to polish Scientologist #1 Tom Cruise's golden commode anyways, they probably have millions of dollars on hand that they can easily sink into an unnecessary upgrade in DC, the hope being to leverage a glamorous image into a bit of that sweet Washington mindshare.
(Someone should clue them in: all they really need are skyboxes and hookers.)
There's a Hubbard memo somewhere in the Xenusphere directing the CoS to actively target for conversion actors, authors, politicians, judges and others who might be seen as American leaders. In practice, though, their little bid for world domination has merely served to make the Moonies look like the farking Bavarian Illuminati.
Your right. We should stop ragging on these people cause they are Religion and to bother them is religious intolerance.
Same as we should stop bothering other religions like the Manson Cult or the Heaven's Gate Group too! Just because Scientology hurts people, both members and those who speak against them, doesn’t give people the right to poke fun at them!
Religious Tolerance people!
People bag on jews, christians, and other religions all the time. It's been going on since theologies were invented. Even God screwed the Jews.
Yeah, I commit fraud and intimidation for a living. But its my religion. So stop your intolerance!
your gonna live, your all gonna die. get the fuck over it, you should be spending your time cleaning my house not doin this dumb ass pissing contest.