July 18, 2006
Hater, Please
We love doing the things we do here at DCist. We like to think we're entertaining, informing, and maybe, on occasion, delighting the greater Washington area with the things we write about this city. We believe we have lots of satisfied readers. But there are also Haters. Haters are inevitable. Usually we giggle over them privately. Sometimes, though, when they're just too cute, they deserve a little public attention. Today, we give you this gem of a Hater from Baltimore.
Yes, a blogger going by the moniker DCist Go Home has decided that we have no business mentioning Baltimore in any way, shape or form. Accusations of mistreating the good name of B-more are outlined thusly:
You're unfamiliar with the subject. You're [sic] audience couldn't care less about Baltimore. Baltimore hates DC. You're a franchise. We're not your suburb. Don't bother.Truly, being taken to task for such offenses as daring to suggest District residents might want to attend a huge music festival in the Baltimore area, occasionally writing a clunky sentence, and failing to publish the Baltimore train schedule, all by someone who uses the wrong "you're", is downright adorable.
As for DCist Go Home's other grievances, we'll answer each as best we can:
- If Ist wants a Baltimore presence, than Ist must create a Baltimore presence (not that I think we'd be interested). Well, we are all corporate drones; that much is true. I'd say that if anyone in Baltimore is interested in starting Baltimorist, you should contact Jake Dobkin at jake (at) gothamist.com. I imagine they'll get you guys up and running sometime after Newarkist, Oaklandist, and East Saint Louisist.
- There are times when the editors of Washington’s Ist opts to treat Baltimore as DC’s red headed step-suburb. Other times, Baltimore is treated with contemptible disdain. Dude, you clearly have no idea how much time we spend chatting about The Wire, John Waters films and Homicide: Life on the Streets. I mean, those things exemplify Charm City perfectly, right hon?
- When it suits their purpose, they’ll occasionally claim Baltimore culture and institutions as being part of their own. We're not sure we know what you mean. The D.C. Metro area has fantastic local food traditions, great stadiums, and a wonderful aquarium. You know, because Baltimore has them, and Baltimore is, of course, just part of the D.C. Metro area.
- Hopefully, this troll blog will quickly die, and never have any need to be updated. Noooooo! We hope to keep hearing from you for years to come.
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As a Baltimoron by birth and Washingtonian till death, I take exception to this! Charm City and Chocolate City are two vastly different places and can each be loved and appreciated for their own unique reasons....Baltimore shouldn't hate DC and DC shouldn't hate Baltimore, let's find a common enemy (Philadelphia? Columbia, Md?) and join our forces for good, not evil.
Some of the grammar and spelling on that site is downright embarassing. Oh well...we can't all be perfectionists.
On a somewhat-related note, I heard through a message board that Pimlico's PUD (Planned Unit Development) ordinance restricts any concert or performance that isn't tied directly to a horse race.
Is the festival already in jeopardy? Stay tuned, I guess...
The photo used for that blog's header is brilliant!
The photo used for that blog's header is brilliant!
Yeah. I thought that was pretty much the only funny part of that movie.
Does DCistGoHome ask itself lots of questions? Yes. Does DCistGoHome answer said questions? You bet. Does DCistGoHome take shit from DCist? FUCK NO, BITCHES!
Crab cakes and football, my man...
why can't we all just get along? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baltimore-Washington_Metropolitan_Area
just kidding. i hate baltimore too.
Generally I got your back DCist, and maybe Oaklandist comming first makes sense (at least it is debatable), but Newarkist and East St. Louisist before Baltimoreist, come on. That is just plain wrong. It makes you look like a stuck up elitist and only perpetuates the negative stereotype of DC people that probably got DCist go home all fired up in the first place. Maybe you had too much coffee today, but please reel in the rheetoric.
In case it's not clear, I really don't hate Baltimore at all. Seems like who live there like it and all. I just think this DCist Go Home thing is too funny not to mock.
DC:Baltimore :: humans:ants
There's no need to hate on something so small and insignificant.
Oh good lord. Baltimore and DC are completely different cities, they just happen to coexist in the same geographical area. DCistGoHome, stop whining and learn basic grammar. DCist, let sleeping cities lie or whatever. Seriously, troll blogs last approx. 5 secs in web time, so let the creators get their panties in a wad for the afternoon and then let them move on to a more deserving target.
BTW, I'd read Baltimoreist. Someone get on that idea!
I remember when we first launched DCist, I got an e-mail from the overlords at Gothamist suggesting we do more with Baltimore, but without much context. When I e-mailed one Baltimore blogger testing the waters to see if there was any room for coordination, I got an earful. The only thing we agreed on was that Laurel and Columbia would remain unclaimed.
Isn't it time to retire the word "hater"? And, if I were DCist, I wouldn't mock the grammar/spelling/typos of any other blogs or posters. I've seen plenty of basic errors on DCist. I mean, just read this:
"In case it's not clear, I really don't hate Baltimore at all. Seems like who live there like it and all. I just think this DCist Go Home thing is too funny not to mock."
Well yeah, I typed my comment too fast and left out a word. There's supposed to be a "people" in there. Thanks, DC Dave.
Isn't Baltimore the city whose primary airport has the word Washington in it? Meanwhile we have two of our own without any mention of our northern neighbor. I think that evidence alone settles this debate.
As no stranger to the MARC, I find that Baltimore and DC are actually closely interrelated. DC is the expensive part of town where nobody under 30 can afford a house and where you go to hang out with staffers and thinktank RAs, and Baltimore is where you go to meet artists, go to communist coffee shops, hit the Book Thing, chill at Dizzy Izzie's over $6 pitchers of Guinness, and otherwise unwind.
DCist had a post a few days ago asking where all the cool kids are living now that a DC studioette is $1000/month, and here's your answer: they're living in Baltimore.
CDTrave, you could make a case that putting a city name in the airport is kind of lame in the first place. Real airports don't need to stoop to such parochialisms. There's no New York in Laguardia's or JFK's titles. No Boston in Logan. No Chicago in O'Hare. But there's Newark in Newark Liberty, Manchester in Manchester-Boston, Chicago in Chicago Midway.
And don't forget Gary-Chicago Airport! I once flew into there on a charter flight. Free parking, one gate, no lines, and an easy drive to Downtown Chicago!
I actually spoke to Jake about doing Baltimorist at SXSW in 2005 and the common thought was that there simply wasn't enough of a potential market for it. I wonder if that's since changed...I'd still be interested in working on said project.
"Isn't Baltimore the city whose primary airport has the word Washington in it? Meanwhile we have two of our own without any mention of our northern neighbor. I think that evidence alone settles this debate."
Ouch. Damn. Score. Somebody just got served, and it wasn't Voltron.
everyone has that freak-cousin we like to have around because they make us look better. that's baltimore! woot! thanks, bmore:)
the best thing about philly??? its not baltimore.
Isn't Washington the city that has to put Baltimore in the name of its Parkway? (Alternately, isn't D.C. the city that has to put George Takei's name on its Parkway?)
And in front too. Baltimore must have a starring role in the Parkway and the airport.
Meanwhile we have two of our own without any mention of our northern neighbor.
And both of those are in NoVA, so where's NoVAist?
Actually, NoVAist may be too general. I think there's enough news oozing out of our vast & balkanized Metro area to support a whole crop of -ist blogs. What about Silver Springist? What about Germantownist? What about Arlingtonst? Shouldn't someone be trumpeting the fact that Arlington is the 13th skinniest municipality in the country?
Seriously, though--does DCist really have enough Baltimore content to justify an entire blog dedicated to responding to DCist's coverage of Baltimore?
The smack and syphilis is much more available for my dollar in Charm City.
Wisen up people: The true enemies are planned communities like Reston and Columbia.
I just always feel sorry for people who have so little to say that they have to theme their blogs around flaming other blogs.
(full disclosure: I myself don't have a blog. because really, do we need another blog in which someone rants bitterly about life?)
I started a blog just so I could add a comment mocking dcistgohome.
"Wisen up people: The true enemies are planned communities like Reston and Columbia."
Lest we not forget that D.C. was a planned community too, over two hundred years ago by a fellow named L'Enfant (yes, he's more than a Plaza.)
And besides - what'd Reston and Columbia ever do to you, anyway?
Hey, enough hating on Columbia already! It was a perfectly fine unincorporated planned community in which to grow up. The schools are generally excellent, the path system is superb, politics are mostly progressive, there's a fair amount of open space, and -- though it's got its fair share of chains -- it now has a few notable eateries in the Iron Bridge Wine Co., Sushi Sono, and Pho Dat Thanh, among others. Merriweather Post Pavilion, aged though it is, beats the pants off of Nissan Pavilion in terms of accessibility. It's the hometown of author Michael Chabon and actor Ed Norton (whose grandfather founded the place). Money magazine just named it (along with the far cuter and more historic Ellicott City) the country's fourth-best "Great American Town" in which to live. I'm proud to be a city-dweller, but what more do you want out of a suburban entity?
I love how his links still read "Google News", "Edit me" and "Edit me".
Always the sign of a well-done blog.
Yes, "having some money" has always been synonomous with "uncool."
I will think of the poor Baltimorians tonight as I watch the Wire on my flat-screen tonight.
Columbia is pure suburban evil and should be eraticated from this planet by any means necessary. Screw columbia, just wipe howard county off the face of the planet and all should be good with the world.
Yes, I grew up there. No, i didn't like one bit of it. It's an suburban planning experiement gone horribly wrong, spawning the most self obsessed competitve people I've ever experienced. Not to mention the scattered low income housing located right near homes supposedly valued at over a million. The planned element of all the chain stores makes the place creepy. and the Columbia Association? Just TRY and add that deck...go ahead, I dare you.
Oh, and Ed Norton is a complete jerk. he was in Clydes of Columbia once while I was working there and acted like an idiot, while Salma was a sweety, spent the entire night apologizing for his stupid behavior.
Both Columbia and Ellicott city are FILLED with a bunch of mindless, conforming drones. If you want to lead a boring, relatively unexciting life chained to your mini van or SUV, go for it. It's perfect for people who simply find thinking for themsevles a bit to tiring.
and yes, It took 15 years for these feelings to fester. THAT is what Columbia/Ellicott City did to me. As luck would have it, I'm now living in the city of Baltimore, owning a home in a pretty hip neighborhood for far less then you poor DC people pay for your 4 x 4 Boxes. I'll wave to you from my roof deck overlooking the harbor and the city. Having money is cool. being house or apartment poor isn't.
"Hey, enough hating on Columbia already! It was a perfectly fine unincorporated planned community in which to grow up. The schools are generally excellent, the path system is superb, politics are mostly progressive, there's a fair amount of open space, and -- though it's got its fair share of chains -- it now has a few notable eateries in the Iron Bridge Wine Co., Sushi Sono, and Pho Dat Thanh, among others. Merriweather Post Pavilion, aged though it is, beats the pants off of Nissan Pavilion in terms of accessibility. It's the hometown of author Michael Chabon and actor Ed Norton (whose grandfather founded the place). Money magazine just named it (along with the far cuter and more historic Ellicott City) the country's fourth-best "Great American Town" in which to live. I'm proud to be a city-dweller, but what more do you want out of a suburban entity?"
Thank you for explaining what I despise about it.
It seems like some of you suburb-disdaining urban hipsters fail to appreciate at least one aspect of such communities:
But for the suburbs, all the people living there would be your neighbors in D.C. or Baltimore, and you'd have to see their toddlers and minivans everyday.
Well, I've gone ahead and registered baltimorist.com and baltimoreist.com to keep the pornographers and spammers from getting to them first. Let me know if you want them. Bidding starts at $10 each.
Columbia is a decent place to grow up in, for all the reasons mentioned (safe, good schools, outdoor recreation, etc). It sucks for street-level music and arts, bars, dance clubs, locally-owned eateries, local culture and flavor, places to hang out other than the mall, and these types of things that progressively-minded yuppies (such as myself) enjoy. I grew up there (1981 - 1999) and I'm much happier with my currest residence in Austin, TX.
I live in Bmore....I never even think about DC. 2 different worlds...we are happy for you all...can't you just be happy for us. It can't be that bad...so many people from DC are moving here and making it unaffordable for the rest of us.
I agree...HATER must be eliminated from the collective American vocabulary ASAP
I moved to Baltimore straight out of college two years ago and i think it's awesome. I hardly ever go to DC...maybe once or twice a year. Don't get me wrong it has its cool points. But I live in an awesome 1 BR apt in an old, oppulent, Mount Vernon Rowhouse with a big front stoop, and a marble fire place for $600/month. Not to mention it's within blocks of cool bars like Brewer's Art, Club Charles, and Owl Bar. I really don't see why DC and Baltimore feel like they need to compete. They're both great for different reasons. I think baltimore has that great gritty, industrial turned post-industrial/modern, market-driven thing and DC has the that whole grand, civic, government-fueled thing.... They're both great. And from an urban planner, I can tell you Baltimore is one of the most exciting places to live right now! You guys really need to stop watching the Wire..long story, but half of it's sets are rigged (i.e. Brewer's Art-turned-strip-club)