August 11, 2006
Inside the House: Restaurant Week, From the Trenches
Inside the House is a DCist feature offering an insider's view of fine dining issues by the hostess at a D.C. restaurant. Her views are strictly her own and do not in any way represent her employer.
Monday kicks off Restaurant Week, the biannual promotion when participating restaurants offer three-course lunch and dinner menus for $20 and $30, respectively. Is it a good deal, considering that most participating eateries normally charge around $30 for an entrée alone? If expectations are set at a realistic level, it can be an inexpensive way to sample a posh restaurant or a different cuisine without spending a fortune. Yet because it draws lots of patrons with little fine dining experience, Restaurant Week usually brings about for restaurant types the number of hilarious, groan-inducing customer stories that the rest of the year will be lucky to match. Here are mine.
Eye-Rolling Level I: Burning Up the Phone Lines at the Worst Possible Time
Why does most telephonic activity have to happen during dinner and lunch rush hour, when we have the least time to work with it? How hard can it be to call before dinner and not in the middle of it? With more than 200 reservations on the book and a smile fixed firmly on my face, there are at least eight people lined up in front of me who are waiting for their turns to be seated. Six more are walking into the door and need to be greeted, asked for the names, checked against the list, and dispatched to their assigned tables when their turn comes. Ten more are on the waiting list milling at the bar and want to make eye contact every 15 minutes to be reassured that their tables are indeed coming up. This is what happens non-stop, without a break, during dinner and lunch rush hours of the Restaurant Week. The phone, meanwhile, is ringing off the hook, and the noise level easily rivals Gravelly Point's. And good luck getting through. That call will be put on hold at least twice because there are guests in front of me, and I can't very well put THEM on hold. So I hope the caller likes "La Vie En Rose" or whatever the “on hold” Muzak happens to be. ‘Cause they’ll be getting an earful.
Eye-Rolling Level I: Getting crafty
A lady telephones wanting a reservation on Saturday night of Restaurant Week.
"I'll be dining with my two daughters. When is a fun time to come in on a Saturday night of Restaurant Week?"
"We'll be full all night long, Madam, so it's up to you. I have 6:15 and 8:30 for three. Which would you like?"
"Hmmm. I would need to check with my kids to decide. Can you reserve both times and I'll give you a call later to pick one?"
I have 230 people on the books. At this point, I feel like putting her on a speaker, and calling all waiters to listen in, as this is simply too good to keep to myself.
"Madam, I regret that my computer won't let me do that. Please pick one."
The voice on the other end slips into a tone of generous tolerance usually used with finicky children who are being naughty and won't eat their turnip puree.
"Can't you make it under two slightly different names? And I'll call you back before Saturday to pick one?"
Eye-Rolling Level II: Asking to Recite the Menu over the Phone – in the Middle of the Dinner Rush
With impeccable timing, my phone rings at around 7:30 p.m., when we have about 25 people to seat. And the customer wants to find out what our RW menu options are.
"What are your specials for Restaurant Week?"
“Two entrees, rockfish provencale and chicken l'ancienne."
"Tell me about your chicken."
"It's a sautéed breast with braised leg with spinach, button mushrooms, lardons, dijon mustard and tarragon jus."
"Okay. Let me put my wife on the line, do you mind repeating it to her?"
Loud sound of gritting teeth working my molars into bleeding stubs.
"Why, I'd be happy to. Sorry about the sound, an awful lot of static on this line. Madam? Our chicken is a sauteed breastwithbraisedlegwithpinachshroomslardonsjonmustardtarragonjus."
"Tarragon jus?"
"Tarragon jus."
"Is this, like, the sauce on top of the chicken?"
Eye-Rolling Level II: Changing the Number of Guests in the Party with No Advance Notice
A reservation for two on Wednesday night. All kinds of special requests: nice table, celebrating anniversary, birthday, newlyweds, successful lobotomy, 20 years since ratification of SALT II and the kitchen sink. Table for two, I repeat, for two.
"Hi! We have a reservation under XXXX. Oh, it's now going to be four."
"Madam, I don't have a table for four and won't for the next 45 minutes."
"But, but it's my birthday! And I really want to be with my friends on my birthday!"
"Madam, your reservation was for two. I don't have a table for four and won't for the next 45 minutes. It's Restaurant Week."
Glare full of seething anger shoots at person at host stand. Polite smile with no teeth showing blooms on face of person at host stand.
"Okay. I guess we will have to go some place else and my birthday is ruined."
"I regret that, Madam, we are rather full tonight."
“Well, am I still going to get my OpenTable points? Even if I don't dine here tonight? All you have to do is press the button, right?"
Eye-Rolling Level III: Starting an Argument about Capacity of Table
A reservation for eight arrives on a Thursday night.
"Hi! This is XXXX, and we had a reservation for eight. It is now going to be, like, eleven."
"Miss, your table seats a maximum of eight."
At this point they always give me a wide-eyed, incredulous look normally reserved for newlywed husbands who just heard the line "I have a headache" for the first time.
"Aw, come on."
"Miss, your table seats a maximum of eight."
"But my friends are on their way!"
"We'll be happy to seat your three additions at a table for three, if and when it becomes available – which will be in about 20 minutes."
I can feel various strategies of Scoring the Table Despite Vile Hostess Behavior turning in between this person's mind. On any given day, these include flattery, humor, quivering underlip and frosty manner. Depending on desperation level, you know.
"Can I see the table?"
"You most certainly may. It seats a maximum of eight."
"We are all, like, very skinny! We like each other! We don't mind being uncomfortable! I promise!"
"Miss, your table seats a maximum of eight. It's been here for close to six years and always seated a maximum of eight."
"So, like, if we made a reservation for 10, where would you have seated us?
"We would have planned your seating in advance. There is also a chance we wouldn't have taken a reservation that large during Restaurant Week."
All 11 sorority-girl lookalikes are now present. The scene that ensues, if filmed, could have provided ample fodder for all manner of psychologists and social scientists who are interested in the workings of sorority GirlMind, as the crowd selects three unlucky ones who will be shoved away to a table for three. From the corner of my eye, I observe the previously monolith crowd of 11 splitting into Princess Bees, Ladies-in-the-Waiting, Unpopular Wallflowers and Scheming Seaters.
To be augmented after this Restaurant Week, I’m sure. Bring it on!
Photo by flickr user iwantamonkey and used under a Creative Commons license.
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please, can DCist just kill this line of postings? i cant even read all the way through this one. they're getting worse, not better.
it smacks of classism, snobbery and general pointlessness. it seems more like an exercise in telling onself how cultured they are than it does in actually passing along valuable information.
Please, these posts do convey valuable information. Judging from your out-of-hand dismissal of Nadya's post, I imagine that you are the target audience. I'm also a bit awed by the need to post on the subject when you "couldn't even read all the way through this one".
Nadya's posts give a good insight into the life of a hostess at a busy DC restaurant, and if nothing else, serve to help folks see both sides of the story. The posts are also extremely well written - more than I can say for your comments, Please.
Why does most telephonic activity have to happen during dinner and lunch rush hour, when we have the least time to work with it?
Because that's when the customers are most likely to have time to call?
Given that not all DCist readers have not or are not currently working in the service industry, I feel that the Nadja's posts are still relevant due to the level of attention DC's dining choices gets from the blogosphere and from mainstream media. Let her posts keep on coming, as they are well written and always start a fun discussion. As always, you can choose not to read her posts and read something else.
As someone who had to perform "customer service" at one time in her life (never again!), I sympathize with anyone who has to put up with the EAF (entitled asshole factor) of DC types. I think the hostess should be allowed to use a tazer on anyone who exhibits this behavior.
I rather enjoy the Inside the House feature.
Alot of folks in DC could use the benefit of the other side's perspective.
Unlike please, I think this is the best of these columns yet.
Though, Nadya, can you confirm/deny the hunch I've had after attending EVERY Restaurant Week since it's inception. Are Restaurants dumbing down the food and reducing the options on the RW menus because RW patrons "wouldn't know any better"?
We've gone from "choose any appy, any entree, any dessert" to "you get one of two choices for each." That kind of ruins the whole spirit of RW if it's to entice the not-so-wealthy into splurging more often, no?
Note to please, then don't read it if you don't like it.
Note to Nadya, good luck during amateur week. Actually was thinking of making a reservation for lunch because you guys are just around the corner from the office, but maybe I'll wait until after RW when I can do something other than my usual drop in for a drink at the bar after work without dealing with the crazyness.
I agree with Nicole. Tazers are a good idea. I've not been in the food service industry, but have been involved in retail customer service here in DC and other States and have never had so many entitled sh*t heads at my counter in my life. the worst I could do to a sh*t head was deny his return, but why would you be a sh*t head in a place where you could ingest the revenge for your sh*t head-ness?
On the other hand, if you know you are going to have a lot of people in your Resaurant for one week a year, bring in some extra staff to man the phones, or hostess booth. It just makes sense.
well I happened to think the post was hilarious.
Paul: It isn't a matter of dumbing down, per say. Its a matter of having to turn a gourmet kitchen into a cafeteria kitchen (in volume) and how to do that in the most respectable way possible. So, if the kitchen has to make 500 of 3 things, it is much easier/will turn out better than trying to run the whole menu with such varied dishes with such varied prep times. This also helps with daily food order from suppliers, etc. Many restaurants can still run their whole menu (read food blogs to find out who is) but it doesn't mean it will be necessarily better than when you are limited at others. If you are really into trying a spot who is doing RW but is still on to pof their game -- find those who are doing pre and post RW menus and go them before/after when it is less frazzled. I think oya and corduroy are among many others who are doing this.
Good points about restuarant ettiquite, but most of these pet peaves seem applicable at any time, not just RW. The patronizing tone suggests resentment of the very people encouraged to participate -- diners interested in experiencing an upscale place who may not have the means or incilination to do so at full price. Bad ettiquette has less to do with fine dining than simple manners. For example, lots of people multiple book in advance and leave one or more places sitting on empty table.
Restaraunts participate in RW because it's a viewed as a classier and more acceptable discount trade practice than coupons or 2-1 offers. It would be refreshing to see more places approach RW honestly as a means of drumming up new business rather than some horrible burden.
I hate getting sucked into RW when celebrating an occasion (ie anniversary) -- it usually means rushed service, often less then ideal quality or selection, and ridiculous crowds, all to be treated as clueless diners by staff who assume you're only interested in a bargain.
my point is just that there's not much of a point in this. i doubt many readers of DCist actually are guilty of this stuff. in fact, most of you seem to be taking delight in the uncouthness of the masses. fine, you're welcome to do it. i'm just making a point that many of you seem to enjoy this type of talk because it makes you feel superior. are you superior? probably. is laughing at ignorant diners sophisticated? nope.
i would propose that instead of regaling in the tales of how stupid customers are, that, instead, the hosts and hostesses just tell the diners "no" and why they cannot accommodate them. no reason to have to share all this with us. after all, it’s your job, right?
really, would this be a feature if it wasnt a restaurant hostess and was, instead, a shoe salesperson talking about the trials and tribulations of working in a service industry? as anyone who has worked in a service industry knows, all this is par for the course. i just object to glorifying it under the guise of being so sophisticated about things the poor plebian masses are unaware of.
Loved it. As someone who considers himself a waiter by training and a businessman by accident, I love these posts. It should give some good perspectives to the typical DCer who works for the government and so has no concept of customer service
I have to say that I disagree with the too-common complaint about calling during lunch/dinner. While I understand the restaurant's point of view, you have to agree that from the customer's perspective, it's just stupid. If you don't want calls, disconnect the phone. Or use an answering machine. Don't be an asshole because I was only able to call at a certain time.
While I did enjoy the post somewhat, I am starting to wonder if Clarence Thomas' (who I would never associate with anything good) prescient quote about "Whine, Bitch & Moan LLC" has taken over the restaurant trade. Clearly the only purpose is to patronize both diners and readers, and I don't particularly appreciate it; if you did it to me in person, I'd tell you off.
Actually, I kinda like the idea of hearing the trials and tribulations of DC shoesalespeople. The very fact that women are willing to pay over a thousand dollars for an ugly pair of shoes is a phenomena that must be dissected.
Please, if you're so disinterested in reading the plight of ignorant narcissists, why are you reading a blog?
Well lets see...
1. I have worked in the restaurant business (as a waiter, host and manager) and currently work in hotels.
2. I dine out quite often on my own dime.
The comments in reponse to the article basically fall into 2 camps
1. Pro-industry - We SERVE because you deserve
2. Non-industry - We DESERVE to be served
The truth, as usual, falls somewhere in the middle. A lot of people are absolute morons if they think that things simply do not work the same during restaurant week as they would on the MOnday before or after. Some restaurants double or triple the amount of business they would normally do on a weekday during restaurant week. Things simply are not the same. On the other hand, it is unfortunate that a lot of restaurants and restaurant staff react badly to this pressure.
Here is my perspective... It is almost never OKAY to change your party size at the last minute, ask for detailed breakdowns of the caloric count of the menu (has happened to me) in the middle of service, it is a lot harder to be accomodating to those requests when it is busiest in the restaurant.
If these happen, and they do, then be willing to work with the staff, accomodate them so they can accomodate you, and chances are you will get what you want. You have no idea how many times I have gotten bumped up a wait list or gotten the table I wanted or any number of things, not because I am in the industry or anything, but because I am NICE and will even occassionally kiss a host or hostess' butt a little bit.
If you make an out of the ordinary request (and changing your party from 8-11 is out of the ordinary) and the host is rude about not being able to accomodate, then you have EVERY right to get upset.
As far as restaurants dumbing down their menu and waiters not providing the best service, vote with your feet. You can easily find out which restaurants are providing full vs limited menu (but don't call at 7:30 on Sat to find out!) and go where you want to. Most restaurants post this info on their website. If the waiters are rude, complain nicely and you will be taken care of.
please, I think folks get so much enjoyment out of hearing the lurid tales of poorly-behaved diners because we can relate to such experiences in our own lives. How many of us have NOT had to deal with socially ignorant people? How many of us, upon reflection, can say in all honesty that there haven't been times when we were social ignorant as well? Try as we might, none of us escape the curse of being clueless from time to time. So when folks enjoy hearing about such things, it isn't because we feel superior, it's because we've all been there, either as the cad or the cad-ee. And it doesn't matter if the column is about working in a restaurant, a shoestore or one of the hugely boring office jobs that exist---we enjoy it because we identify with it in some way.
That said, though, Nadya's feature also serves a useful service. Because we can see how the socially ignorant look from the other side, we can adjust our own behavior so that we don't fall into that camp. I wish more people were exposed to this feature, because the more people who are looking at both sides, the better.
I've never commented here before, but I've read every post from this series and agree with the original commentor. It's clear that Nadya enjoys her position as the glamorous hostess looking down on the slovely masses from on high. After coming across her name on another foodie blog and reading her ridiculous posts there I'm shocked and appalled that DCist continues to publish her at all. Who honestly includes in a restaurant review that "the other diners were well-dressed and attractive, as opposed to so many other locales in DC" -that would be Nadya...paraphrased, but pretty close.
Now that I know where she hostesses I will be sure to NEVER patronize her restaurant. You may want to keep in mind that this is DC, not some swanky NYC hot spot where you can turn ugly people away at the door and air kiss celebrities all night.
Everyone reading this board knows how to behave in a restaurant. This series continues to be demeaning and is the opposite of what I would expect to be the inner thoughts of anyone in the service industry. Maybe you could try writing a column on diners you actually like? Are there any? Do any of us meet the standards of the goddess Nadya?
As a consultant, I too am in the service industry. Sometimes my clients are assholes. But you know what? I honestly do my very best to make sure they are satisfied with the work I do for them, even if they never thank me, treat me badly, or don't understand how they are supposed to behave. You know why? Because they pay me. They are the reason I have a job. They get to be assholes because they're the ones with the money. Same goes for the restaurant biz.
I know the first comment in reply will be, "well clearly you are one of the people this post is intended for." No, I'm not. Stop assuming that everyone who hates this series of posts is an ignoramous who probably still only tips 15% and spits on their waiter.
DCAC says, "They get to be assholes because they're the ones with the money. "
This is the exact type of thinking that leads to the Culture of Entitlement that so defines everything wrong with DC.....
Mocking the behavior of the uncouth is a time-honored literary tradition. It has less to do with the need to vouch for one's superiority as it does as a simple instruction on proper behavior. Read some Moliere, maybe. Or some Dr. Seuss.
What should be done? Should there be posts CELEBRATING idiotic behavior? Heck, if someone wants to write up a post documenting all the jack moves and dumb questions you subjected some poor restaurant hostess to, I say let's run it and how well it does.
Oh, please people. Get a sense of humor. It's an article. These are stories. Enjoy them. If you don't enjoy them, move on.
Nadya - keep up the good work. I believe that you are helping more folks than those that leave nasty comments. And, may of those of us you help simply enjoy the chuckle!
May the chaos begin... Happy Restaurant Week!
This is all very silly...anyone who has to work with the general public knows that there is a small (or not so small, sometimes) elite group of individuals who seem to be utterly ignorant of social standards and decency or just plain lack common sense. None of the things mentioned by Nadya (zdrastvui) in her posts are behaviors that couldn't be corrected by following the Golden Rule (how would you feel is your dinner guests added 3 extra people at the last minute), as well as my own Golden Rule - Act like you've been there before (i.e. act like you know what you're doing).
There's nothing elitist or smug about expecting people to follow basic protocol.
Irrespective of the specific restaurant context in this particular case, since when is it elitist to point out that some people are indisputably arseholes?
I can tell you this; I will never eat at the restaurant she works for.
This is foodie snobbery at its purest. Not every customer is going to conform to your wishes, darling. It's called the service industry, because the job is to serve. And bashing the public in an online forum for calling during dinner! and not knowing exactly what a jus is! and asking lots of questions! is deplorable. I'm surprised you haven't been fired.
Ah, well. Live and learn. Foodie snobs and narcissistic online typing/wankery, they never change.
Worse, we're talking about the typing/wankery.
I, for one, will be at the restaurant she works for on Saturday. Perhaps we shall see...
In any case, service is a two-way street. Your being served should not interefere with others, or should do so to a minimum degree. Expecting that people waiting to be seated will be ignored so that you can save yourself the trouble of reading the menu off the website is rather unreasonable imo.