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The Manhattan Project
Love. True love. That indefinable flame that sometimes sparks between two people the first time they meet. The crackle of electricity, the rush of endorphins. That idyllic brand of love at first sight that has inspired great poets throughout the ages. That singular moment when you look into a pair of eyes just as starry as yours, and know, in your heart, in your gut, in your little toes, that this person, and no other, was molded just for you.
This week's finest quote is dedicated to the exact opposite of all of that.
Quote of the Week
A couple quite obviously on a first (and last) date at the National Gallery:
He: "This is man art."
She: "Huh?"
He: "Like the kind of art you'd put in your cabin: it's got a dead animal, a weapon, and a naked chick. I like going to art museums, 'cause I like boobs a lot, and there are tons of picture of them here."
After the jump, all sales are final, Metro's only stop dedicated to babies, and existential meditations on pedestrian travel.
It's lonely in the Overheard offices without you. So drop us a love note, preferably with an amusing quote, at overheardindc (at) gmail (dot) com.
Photo by Flickr user zachstern.
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They also don't accept returns of that clever F.B.I. (Female Body Inspector) t-shirt you bought.
Outside Citibank at 14th and K st:
Woman approaching sidewalk vendor with plastic wrapped sweatshirt: "Hi, I bought this from you yesterday. I think I need and XS instead of a small."
Vendors: (staring at her strangely)
Woman: (shoving package towards them) "Don’t you have an XS? You did yesterday. What, you don’t do exchanges? Don’t you remember me from yesterday?"
Vendors: (still staring at her awkwardly, rather amazed)
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If you get to El Toddler, you've gone too far.
Riding the metro after a Nationals game, a couple with thick southern accents:
Man: "Which stop do we have to get off?"
Lady: "I think it's El Infant Plaza."
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Only if you go in circles.
Catholic University students overheard on the Red Line:
Student 1: "I'm sooooo tired."
Student 2: "I know, and we still have to walk all the way across campus."
Student 1: "God, I hate walking."
Student 2: "Me too. It's so.....pointless."
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We could tell you why, but it's more fun to leave that to your imagination:
Three people in an office making fake vomit out of candle wax, paper, and various food products, as part of one of the group member's 6 month anniversary present for her boyfriend:
Coworker #1: "Hey, I have some mustard packets!"
Coworker #2: "Do you really think we should use mustard?"
Coworker #3: "We just have to cover it well with the wax. Let's use it!"
Coworker #1: "Ok, spicy or regular?"
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I love this segment. I have to try so hard to imagine how funny these quotes are. They really are funny, if you can get past the DCist copy. It's almost like humor excerises for your brain.
Ok, I MUST know why! What kind of a present is fake vomit?