July 18, 2007
Best Washington Post Headline Ever
Presented without commentary. Or much commentary, anyway. I'd like to see some suggestions for other kinds of stories for which this headline might be useful, so get cracking in the comments.
UPDATE: Poor washingtonpost.com is taking a real beating today. Via Wonkette, it seems someone reposted the obituaries of Presidents Ronald Reagan and Gerald Ford yesterday, in such a way that it seemed as though the Post was reporting their deaths very, very late.
UPDATE II: As noted in comments, washingtonpost.com has replaced the greatest headline of the year with newer, more mundane version: "Create Your Own Salad." Sadly, not a lot of jokes to be made about that one. Stick with you convictions, washingtonpost.com copy editors!
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When I checked it, the headline said, "New Salads To Toss"
I'm pro toss and I vote!
THAT'S a mouthful!
The Mitt Romney Salad?
I can't imagine a salad tossing article without the requisite goatse-esque hands-gripping-a-salad-bowl pic.
Oh my, how about using the WaPo headline as a subtitle for this story from today's New York Times: http://www.nytimes.com/2007/07/18/education/18abstain.html?_r=1&oref=slogin
Oh my, how about using the WaPo headline as a subtitle for this story from today's New York Times: http://www.nytimes.com/2007/07/18/education/18abstain.html?_r=1&oref=slogin
A girl named Jami Waite is the public spokesperson for a group called "Virginity Rules." How aptonymtastic.
Jami Waite: A Salad That's Never Been Tossed.
the print version is 'diversify and dig in'
Jami needs to hook up with Eric Love, the director of the East Texas Abstinence Program, also quoted in that article. They'd be the Love-Waites.
JAMI WAITE: A SALAD THAT'S NEVER BEEN TOSSED
If You've Been Waiting Boys, You'll Need To Diversify and Dig In!
I wonder, would abstinence proponents even consider salad tossing "sex?"
Then again, there are some in the South who still refer to tampons as "Satan's Cottony Little Fingers."
Does it come with The Olsen Twins Extra Virgin Olive Oil Dressing?
Apparently, in some Latin American countries where men still prize a new bride's virginity, many women freely engage instead in anal sex, leaving them "technical virgins." So, don't be so sure Ms. Waite's salad has not been tossed.
In that case, I hope some nice sensitive gentleman tossed her a greek salad with lots of nice Wishbone dressing. Wouldn't want her to deal with briskly shaken Russian dressing that might result in embarrassing premature tossage.
What the hell were we talking about anyway?
Guest # 15: I have met many "Catholic" girls in the good ol' U.S. and A that practice this form of "abstinence" as well.
This headline reminded me of a WCP article from last summer about ticket scalping at our local NFL games titled "Redskins Endorse Scalping".
You could use the same headline for a feature on the Scared Straight prison program.
The headline reminds me of the WP story that was originally titled something like "DC Fires Retarded Agency Head" until they changed it to something more sensitive that didn't imply the agency head was himself retarded.
It's not just the Post's headlines -- they posted some really bad pictures from Mayor Fenty's endorsement of Obama yesterday.
It appears that the Post has gotten wind of this, and changed the headline. I guess this just proves you do need interns....
What's the big deal about tossing salad? Non-tossed salad tastes like ass.
cue rimshot
^^^Don't you mean, rim job?
Well, at that point, Hillrat, the salad would be tossed.
You never go ass to mouth. Never.