Does D.C. Have A Novel Deficiency?
Mark Athitakis' latest article in the City Paper, "Building the Great D.C. Novel," is a fine one, and it really gets the mind grapes juicing. It takes up a noble task: how to write the classic DC novel.
His thesis, for which he builds a solid case, is this, "Though a few have come close, the Great American Novel has bypassed Washington." Along the way, Athitakis speaks to Jeffrey Charis-Carlson, a "scholar of DC literature" who's been immersing himself in the subject for his dissertation, and finds that he has "had a rough time finding a singular book that might rank with the likes of The Adventures of Augie March, The Bonfire of the Vanities, The Big Sleep, A Confederacy of Dunces—novels that drill deep into how a city operates, giving you a sense that multiple waterfronts are being covered."
That's not to say that Athitakis is harshing on the literary offerings that stem from, and speak of, this city. He isn't. He makes copious mention of authors that have been inspired by and in the city (Chris Buckley, Ana Marie Cox, Ward Just, and others). Nevertheless, it should be noted that DC lit often does get some short shrift. Browse out to the Wikipedia page devoted to DC culture, and you can stub your way through topics related to film and theatre, music and museums, but nothing on books.
That seems shortsighted. DC novels are out there: the genre-anthropologies of George Pelecanos typically spring to mind, and you've likely pored through any number of spy thriller set in the city as well. But there's much more. There are sweeping historical epics from Henry Adams (Democracy) and Gore Vidal (Washington, D.C.), a classic horror novel that's turned a staircase into a tourist attraction (Blatty's The Exorcist), snapshots of ordinary lives (Andrew Hollaran's Grief, Paul Kafka-Gibbons' Dupont Circle, Ann Beattie's Chilly Scenes of Winter), the poli-sci-lite lit of Kristin Gore, and at least one wack-ass coming-of-age story: Christina Stead's The Man Who Loved Children.
But I get what Athitakis is after. He's looking for that essential DC novel—the book that takes on the "multiple waterfronts," finds a way to integrate different races and classes, finds a sweep and scope that doesn't ignore the Federal City at the center of Washington, but doesn't get bogged down there either. He identifies four novels that break out into the component parts he finds important, but he's dreaming of a novel that knits it all together.
It's a daunting task, given the traditional transience of the city and the fact that our central industry—governance—is as apt to alienate as it is to fascinate. What to do, what to do? Well, in The Areas Of My Expertise, John Hodgman maintains that the most salable premise in novels is "all animals versus all humans." So maybe we need a novel that depicts the entire city, coming together as one to fight all the city's animals—the rats, the pigeons, the cherry-blossom chomping beavers, the snakehead fish that walk on land, and all the denizens of the national zoo. It can contain lines like:
Dammit! We've tried it your way, Kucinich! But if we want to make it through this day alive, we need to start using the things that make this city truly great! Like our deep-seated, toxic distrust of neighborhood improvements and our confusing, zone-based, taxi fare system!
And the whole thing can end with a mortally wounded Marion Barry, breathing his last as he impales Butterstick upon a DC flag, choking out the words, "Celebrate and discover, you bamboo-chomping m*therf*cker!"
Or...maybe not. Still, as Athitakis says, "The field is wide open for somebody with the nerve to give the Great D.C Novel a shot." We'll take your best pitch, commenters.