May 30, 2008
Fireworks Ban Back on the Table
Mayor Adrian Fenty held a news conference yesterday to announce his support for emergency legislation that would ban the sale and use of all consumer fireworks in the District. The bill is set to be introduced to the D.C. Council on Tuesday.
Setting off fireworks in the city during the July 4th holiday has long been a tradition in certain District neighborhoods, but has also been a source of safety concerns, not to mention noise complaints. Council member Jim Graham (D-Ward 1) introduced a similar measure last year after six people were injured due to fireworks.
Nine D.C. Council members will have to vote in favor of the emergency measure next week for the ban to take effect. If it passes, fireworks would be made illegal well before the 4th of July.
Photo by ellievanhoutte
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The real problem isn't the fireworks. It's the fireworks that go off long into the night. Make them illegal after 9pm, punishable by a $500 fine or marmots biting off your johnson or both.
And any yakuza will tell you that missing fingers have plenty of cachet with the sexy ladies. Aw yeah.
No, the problem isn't simply that the fireworks go late into the night. The problem is that they start setting them off in early June, they set them off day or night, they set them off in your yard and still burning pieces land on your roof and in your yard.
i think the punishment should be one Black Cat up each nostril.
kaboom!
I agree with you, Monkey, but if you're going to ban them after 9pm, you might as well just ban them altogether. After all, it's not even dark until nearly that point on the 4th of July anyway.
Also, Fire Chief Dennis Rubin says that there were six "significant injuries" related to fireworks last year in Washington.
I bet there's more gun violence on the 4th than there are firework-related injuries. That's not to say we can't do something about it, I just think it's interesting. Maybe this should be a 2nd ammendment issue? What if I choose to defend myself with Roman Candles?? I prefer to send my attackers running in a TRUE blaze of glory!
we had some fun fireworks shows in teh bloomingdale back in april. got someone arrested, apparently, though not sure what the charges were.
If we ban fireworks, only the hoodlums will have fireworks!!!
It's a real shame that today's generation of kids will never know the simple summer pleasures of improvising mortars out of acorns, M80s, beer cans, and duct tape. It's like they're being robbed of their childhood! What's next? Banning magnifying glasses so you can't burn ants and plastic Army men on your window sill? How about banning bike tires so you can't flip your bike over, crank up the wheel, and burn the face off your Billy Blastoff doll so he's got a hollow hole where his stupid deadpan grin should be?
This used to be one hell of a country. I'll be goddamned if I know what happened to it.
I love how some people see this... "It is part of this Cities culture" Just like parking illegally on Sundays, it is perfectly acceptable for children to endanger others and my property because of "culture" Maybe lowbrow culture is a more appropriate term. I have dealt with this situation for 5 years and it is not acceptable for 10-15 children from PG county who are visiting their grandma to come into the city and set off fireworks across from my house without any Adult supervision. Then the adults pathetic attempt to "clean-up" afterwards. I'm tired of it and it is not being a good neighbor.
Since the only legal fireworks in DC are snakes, sparklers, and fountains, isn't this law going to eliminate the stuff that really isn't a problem? The fireworks that everyone's complaining about are already illegal in DC.
mccullo3 - So what exactly is it going to take to stop the 10-15 PG County kids from setting the fireworks off? Because last time around, the cops didn't do s**t when they were called. This will never be an enforcement priority with them no matter how many people complain.
And do you really think any of these people give a s**t about being a "good neighbor?" They're too busy living in squalor.
A single particle of second-hand smoke will endanger a person's health and safety far more than ten thousand fireworks, and yet DC will not ban smoking from sidewalks.
Personally, I just love the idea that banning fireworks will actually have any significant impact on the illegal firecracker and bottle rocket shows all over the city on the 4th. It may cut down on their casual use in the weeks ahead when you can't buy a pack of bottle rockets and shoot them right off from the next block, but people will still find plenty of ways to get their hands on them for the holidays.
Will the ban on fireworks be as successful as the ban on handguns?
MHO -- where is your house so I can send these kids over there to set off 10,000 fireworks in front yard. Let's see if it is still there in the morning and then you can defend your safety stance.
Monkeyerotica -- you're right... DC Police rarely enforce any laws unless they are forced into it... so we should do away with all laws... just think of all the money we would save by not having police officers enforcing pesky rules.
So, can the police calibrate their Shotspotters to zoom in on bottle rockets and M80s? At least you'd have some evidence for prosecuting them for disturbing the peace.
Also, FYI, Fourth of July is THE BEST time to shoot that special someone you want out of your life. Just wait for the fireworks to cover the gun report and the "problem" takes care of itself.
Just make sure you have that body wrapped up really tight in that carpet when you take it to the bulk waste disposal station at Fort Totten. And make sure to tip your attendant at least a $20 so there's no questions asked. Tell 'em monkey sent you! (You owe me one, Antwayne.)
Okay, I'll bite. How do you force the cops to enforce a law that they haven't been enforcing EVER? I suppose you could have them arrested, but then you'd have to find cops to arrest cops for not enforcing the laws they haven't been enforcing anyway, and by that time you're already approaching Foucaultian levels of dissonant simulacra that you're just better off investing in a nice set of earplugs or some wireless headphones or better yet, push the speakers into the window and cranking up the Wagner.
There is a difference between gunshots in an alley and acting like a bag of teenage dicks during the summer. I mean, if we arrested everyone for being an a**hole, there'd be no one left to pay DC's taxes.
Then again, the roads would be pretty deserted and you'd finally be able to park in Shaw on Sunday.
Ban 'em! My neighborhood feels like Bagdhad on the 4th of July. Granted, if they make fire works illegal it will make it more difficult to shrug off the sound of gun shots under the assumption that they are only fireworks.
Light-em up. They go BOOM BOOM BANG! Scares the dogs. Dog gone it.
Actually, Bagdhad on the 4th of July is pretty quiet. You're thinking of the end of Ramadan, when everybody breaks their fast and goes apes**t and shoots their AK47s into the air.
Dear Safety Nannies,
Get a life.
That is all.
-C
I gave up on the National Mall years ago in favor of the neighborhood displays in Petworth. The neighborhood is ten times as much fun to watch as the Mall. I'd hate to see that go away.
Beyond that, though, if a few people getting injured (likely because of their own stupidity) is the criteria for banning the activity that caused those injuries, we've got a whole lot of laws that need passing.
Let me second that. What is wrong with you people? Mind your own business and let people enjoy themselves. Some of you are so uptight. And worse, you feel that you can make others conform to your uptight insecure view of how the world should be. Why did all you uptight people have to move to DC? Isn't there somewhere else you could have gone? You are driving all culture from this city.
You'll put an eye out!
Hey you idiots!! How about this business in Shaw who had to shut down for 6+ weeks plus tenants who did not have power for over a month because of your beloved dangerous fireworks. Here's to your "culture"
http://lifein.mvsna.org/index.cfm/2007/10/25/Signs-of-Life-at-Breakwells
But go ahead and defend the "right" to shoot burning projectiles into the air and such. I personally hope all of you defending this have to deal with fire destroying your life. Let me tell you it's not a fun experience. Better hope you insurance riders are up to date.
The problem is that you're a dumbass 12-year-old ghetto shit, not a fucking pyrotechnics technician.
Do I cite every alcohol related death and say we should ban alcohol? What else should we ban? I think I know your answer. Everything you don't care for. Give me culture any day. Your like just make this city bland. Old folks homes are quiet peaceful places to live. Why don't you just admit yourself into one now instead of turning this city into one?
So the noisy exploding crap is already illegal in DC. WTF is this ban supposed to be on? Roman candles? Sparklers? Those little flaming worm disks that smell like burnt hair?
So six idiots were injured last year? Meanwhile, tens of thousands are injured on bicycles. We need to ban those deathtraps-on-wheels post haste! Just so long as we don't blow them all up with fireworks.
Can someone please insert a Roman candle into our esteemed Councilman from Ward 1? While they're still legal, I mean.
so let's see, the lack of loud, smelly, dangerous fireworks that scare dogs and keep people up all night long will somehow suck the culture out of DC. do you also condone dog fighting, prostitution, and gang violence? those add a lot to our "culture" here too.
move to Mexico, douche bag.
Geek.
So where exactly do these gangs of hookers fight eachother with dogs and fireworks? Is this like a Swampoodle thing or can I find this in Trinidad? I am all over that s**t!
DC is a vibrant city. I fail to see how DC can continue to vibrate without s**t exploding spectacularly at all hours and stupid kids getting parts of themselves blown off.
Why do you hate America? More importantly, what does Heidi Montag think of all this?
Oh, I'm sorry. Did that comment scare your poor dog? Or cause you to lose a little sleep once a year?
all of you people who are calling cheap-shit pyrotechnics displays by drunk old men and crazy little kids "culture" need to pull your collective heads out of your collective asses and stop glorifying stupidity. would you also defend confederate flags as culture, or something else inane? give it a rest.
i don't have a big problem with neighborhood displays on independence day. there's nothing more american than celebrating our country by blowing up a small piece of it.
that said, the fireworks going off nightly from memorial day to halloween is ridiculous. i wouldn't mind seeing that tamped down a bit.
I'm kept awake by all you collar popping frat boys walking home from the bars late at night. Can I ban you?
Unless the fireworks ban is rescinded, who will carry on the hallowed tradition of putting fireworks in dog poo?
Hate to feed the trolls, but Roberts and Carn are obviously DCPS almost-graduates. Now go get me my fries, you two slack-jawed mouth breathers, and make sure you shave that panda goddammit! And if you can find any of those fluffy NBA logo socks for my footsies, I'll take five or six pair.
Any attempt to expand the fireworks ban is doomed to failure. Even if the police did manage to round up all the illegal fireworks, the kids would only resort to eating lots of raw cabbage and lighting their farts. Sure, it's not nearly as noisy but the stench is unbearable. You might as well call the place Cabbage-poots Heights.
This is how the terrorists will win: we give up our freedoms for percieved safety until all we're left with is a brown smelly fog and singed butthairs. That's not the America I grew up in! That isn't even Mexico!
it's all fun and games until someones block catches on fire
Why don't they just make shooting fireworks into houses illegal. It's just as ineffective as banning fireworks altogether and everyone still gets to blow up some shit.
But if we ban fireworks, how will I be able to naively deceive myself that those were fireworks, not gunshots, I just heard in my alley?
Don't mess with my fragile sense of safety people.
Please yes. Last year I watched kids shoot roman candles at each other and at random pedestrians. I watched kids run into the street to set fountains in front of oncoming (if slow-moving) buses. Around the neighborhood there were several major organized displays of seriously high powered stuff for large audiences of assembled friends/family/neighbors on blankets and lawn chairs that had serious potential for disaster. Most cities have outlawed this sort of thing because they learned the hard way how deadly fireworks can be. Apparently DC hasn't yet had a sufficiently large disaster. Hopefully they'll pass this law before they do.
Apparently DC hasn't yet had a sufficiently large disaster.
Sounds like you don't think DC is dumb enough to have a disaster. Them's fightin words, my friend!
I don't want to live in a country where I can't exercise my right to chase people with burning roman candles or stick lit rags in people's gas tanks. So you can take that commie talk back to Moscow, comrade.
To repeat what Mojotron said hours ago, "The fireworks that everyone's complaining about are already illegal in DC."
Did you catch that? Here, I'll say it again: "The fireworks that everyone's complaining about are already illegal in DC."
Still unclear on the issue? Here's a clarification: "The fireworks that everyone's complaining about are already illegal in DC."
Firecrackers? Already illegal. Bottle rockets? Already illegal. Roman candles? Already illegal. Anything--yes, anything--that flies, explodes, or moves? Already illegal.
Current law:
F-3309.1.1.1 Prohibited Fireworks. The manufacture, possession, storage, display, sale, setting off, or discharge of any fireworks listed below is prohibited in the District of Columbia:
1. Firecrackers of any kind or description;
2. Any fireworks that explodes, such as cherry bombs, salutes, roman candles, floral shells, artillery shells;
3. Any firework intended to move after the piece is placed and fired; such as bottle rockets, parachutes, buzzbombs, pinwheels, helicopters, jumping jacks;
4. Sparklers more than 20 inches (508 mm) in length;
5. Any firework that contains mercury, arsenic tetryl, phosphorous, sulphocyanide, mercury, magnesium, potassium picrate, gallic acid, chlorate compounds, gunpowder, sulphur, chlorate or potash and sugar, or any highly oxidizing agent;
6. Any firework having a side fuse, or a fuse inserted at any point along the length of the firework; and
7. Any firework found by the Fire Chief to be dangerous to th