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Overheard in D.C.: Grocery Greatness

grocery storeGrocery stores in D.C. — there's a lot to say about them, and not much of it is good. Um, they're open sometimes. You can usually purchase items there. That's good, right? Aside from that, D.C. supermarkets are best known for having poor selection, long lines, a questionable level of cleanliness, unhelpful staff, crazy customers, and on and on. Today's overheard comes from a grocery store PA announcement.

They ought to bring Friendliness also.

Overheard of the Week

At the Safeway in Southeast:

A clerk makes an announcement over the PA speakers:

"Honesty to customer service. Honesty, please come to customer service."


After the jump, more grocery shenanigans, cursing at mom, and enunciation.

There's been a lot of good stuff coming in, so keep it up! overheardindc (at) gmail (dot) com

Photo by sandcastlematt

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George W. Bush is really trying to expand his cabinet.

Walking down 18th Street, around 3:15 a.m. Sunday morning:

Girl talking to mohawked probable boyfriend:

“I don’t understand why you can’t enunciate and say library instead of liberry!”

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P.S. Thanks for tuition.

At a graduation party at a U Street-area apartment:

The host drunkenly dropped a knife on his foot, making a rather deep cut, and called his parents to ask about what to do. They didn't answer, so he left a voicemail:

Host: "Mom, Dad, I think I need stitches so it would REEEEAAALLY help if you could answer the FUCKING phone--"
Host's fiancee: "Honey, you can't say "fuck" to your parents!"
Host: [to fiancee, but still speaking into the phone] "I can't say FUCK to my mom over the phone? AWW FUCK!"

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Until I get my bad-ass '85 Chevy Citation fixed up.

Outside Chief Ike's Friday night:

A pimped-out car with hydraulics rolls by on its side, everyone looks and stares.

Drunk Girl: "That's lame, my Prius is better."

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We already knew.

A few weeks ago at the Pentagon City mall:

A slow-walking tourist says to his wife, "You better speed up, honey, or they'll know you're from Indiana!"

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Hm.

Outside Marvin a few nights ago:

Two mid 20s guys leaving.

Guy 1: "I mean, so what if I passed around [girl's] naked pictures, I’m still a moral person."
Guy 2: "What kind of moral person?"
Guy 1: "Amoral."

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Remote control planes, however, no problem.

On a Chicago to D.C. flight:

A small boy, about five, to his father as the boy reads the safety instruction card on the plane:

"Look Daddy, they say 'No remote controlled cars on the airplane.'"

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Your weekly Columbia Heights Giant happy time.

On Wednesday:

Two women are arguing in line. The argument gets more and more loud until:

Woman 1: "Can you hear this, bitch?" [woman holds up middle finger]
Woman 2: "You can suck my dick!"
Woman 1: [regretfully] "Mom!?"

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