At least he isn't trying to shut down another U Street hot spot.

What utter bullshit. Everybody knows VA drivers with their volvo's and audi's think all streets are the autobahn baby test course.

Looks like I'm a white devil, a she devil, and now a driving devil - triple threat!

I don't drive very often though (Zipcar devil?), and as a pedestrian I am usually more afraid of Virginny drivers. I swear they aim for me in the crosswalks.

Not sure if his overly generalized claim is true, but if it is maybe it's because MD drivers know DC roads far better than VA drivers (since we are attached at the hip). My generalized observation is that VA drivers are the slowest and least savy DC drivers.

Former MD driver. MD drivers may not be the devil incarnate, but they are worse than Hitler.

VA drivers are just plain stupid.

DC drivers are incapable of parking in less than 20 minutes.

MD pedestrians, however, are nonexistent.

DC pedestrians are ugly.

VA pedestrians are fat and smell.

I saw a car a couple months ago with a license plate from Guam. He was just meandering along with his Island mentality, not knowing where to turn, probably still trying to figure out how he even GOT his car to DC. I say we unite beyond our petty differences and take out vengeance on these Guamaniac menaces!!!

In other words: rabble rabble rabble.

I couldn't disagree with erahk0 more. Maryland drivers are the worst, b/c they insist on driving the slowest in the left lane. The majority of the time if there is a turtle in the left lane it is a maryland driver. That is what causes others to veer in and out of lanes. I'm sorry, but people are going to drive fast (whenever possible), get out of the left lane. Maybe more virginians have audis. They also go faster, so get your POS, never been inspected, always overheating, catch on fire, ford taurus out of the left lane.

Now when in comes to driving within the city...yeah everyone sucks. DC Drivers at least have the sense to look out out for pedestrians. Pedestrians though, gotta follow those crosswalk signs. In Germany, people DO NOT jaywalk...EVER. Because of that, traffic flows within their cities and they don't have issues of people getting smashed by metro buses and angry drivers.

i loves me some grahamstanding as much as the next former ward 1 resident...

MD drivers drive me nuts. they are the usual suspects when someone tries to run my white biking ass off the road (though DC drivers have tried their damndest too).

jiminy graham flying around in his little VW convertible isn't helping the traffic situation either. anyone notice that the man who is on the WMATA board never seems to actually ride the buses or metro?

I live in Maryland but I still have DC plates. I will be throwing off Jim Graham's newly installed devil-o-meter with my stealth residency!

Christian mythology tells us that the devil was/is a fallen angel. Can we be sure that MD drivers ever held a position so high?

MD drivers are the worst in my experience. Their general attitude seems to be "fuck everyone else, get out of my way, I'll disobey every sign, light, pavenment marking, and speed limit, especially if it involves cutting someone else off, running down pedestrians, or re-creating a grand prix in a residential neighborhood."

DC and VA drivers aren't all that much better. But on the whole, I tend to agree with Graham, eventhough I think he's a blowhard.

Maybe Big Jim will put up road blocks to stop Maryland drivers from entering D.C.
Or Put up holy water fountains to stop the demonic
menace.

I remember living in Adams Morgan, I would try to shop at the Safeway. I could never find a parking spot nearby because there were cars from MD taking them all.

Fortunately, that Safeway has a parking garage. However, when I got in there all the spaces were taken by people with MD plates!

I had no idea people commuted all the way from MD to shop at one of the worst grocery stores in the city.

VA drivers: aggressive, arrogant

MD drivers: dumb as a bag of bricks

DC drivers: see "MD drivers" above

I had no idea people commuted all the way from MD to shop at one of the worst grocery stores in the city.

Evidence supporting my thesis that MD drivers have the IQ of a bowl of soup.

As a Baltimore native, I am grieved to say this, but I'm with IMGoph. Whenever a vehicle tries to run me down on my bike, inevitably it's from Maryland. I would say 3 out of 4 of the cases involve a big black SUV.

I suspect that it's a disease inherent in driving big black SUVs, as the drivers have spanned every conceivable demographic.

Ugh, Maryland drivers are scary, and it says a lot coming from a guy who grew up driving around Massholes. They either drive very aggressively, or they stop in the middle of the street for no reason what so ever. And can't parallel park to save their life.

Yea but people from DC are the worst walkers. I swear to god if they are crossing a road and see a car coming they will slowdown and dare the car to hit them. Its been so bad at time's I've been tempted to oblige.

If DC wants to reduce pedestrian accidents they need to repeal the pedestrian is always right rules, and put some real deserved fear into pedestrians. In a game of chicken between them and a car, the car is going to win.

Yes, yes, yes! I AM REEMED!!!! IT IS TRUE!!! AND VIRGINIA DRIVERS ARE LOST AND IN THE WAY MOSTLY ALL THE TIME.

MARYLAND DRIVERS RACE IN FRONT OF YOU TO THE NEXT STOP LIGHT --IN THE LEFT LANE TOO (SO THEY CAN BE FIRST- ATYPE PERSONALITY/TERRITORIALISM) AND THEN JUST SIT THERE BECAUSE THEY ARE ON THEIR PHONES OR JUST ZONING OUT ON THAT CRACK PIPE THEIR SMOKING.

YEAH DCIST!!!! WE'RE NOT ALONE .

THANK YOU SOOOOOOOO MUCH FOR THIS COVERAGE!

MD drivers drive as if they are completely unaware there is anyone else using the road. No turn signals, drive whatever speed (usually 5 under) in any lane. They don't let anyone in because they aren't paying attention.

VA drivers are completely aware of the other drivers. However, they go out of their way to inconvenience them.

Oops. Sorry about the "reemed" I meant "redeemed" and my comment about the crack pipe may be a little strong I admit. But they got to be smoking something the way they drive. Yikes!!!

Should we be looking at a good ol' fashioned exorcism? Rev. Jim Graham (D-Ward 1) can lead the services. There may be an optional bar-shuttering afterwards.

I'm with demonfafa. Everyone knows the worst drivers are from Rohan. For what is the House of Rohan but a thatched barn where brigands drink in the reek and their brats roll on the floor with the dogs? The victory at 14th and Columbia does not belong to you, Graham VeeDub Master. You are a lesser son of greater sires.

Finally ALL drivers and pedestrians do not understand the concept of getting out of the way of an emergency vehicle. Flashing lights=get the hell out of the way not let me scootch through the light at the last second.

amen, amen, amen, ahaak! i sit in utter awe sometimes, watching a car sit in front of a fire truck with lights and sirens ablaze, marveling at the fact that they refuse to get out of the way!

i only hope that these morons who don't understand that emergency vehicles have someplace important to go, goddamnit will get their comeuppance someday, hopefully when the fire truck coming to save their house from a nasty conflagration can't make it because they've been stuck in traffic!

This is the silliest argument. You can't generalize that people from an ENTIRE STATE drive in the same manner. Grow up. Also, Jim Graham likes little boys.

Could VA and MD possibly have more boring license plates? I think that explains everything.

Ummm… YES you can generalize! That is what life is all about. And this is ONE more vote that drivers from MD are possessed by the evil spawn of Beelzebub on meth. Living on a small residential DC street, I can say 9 out of 10 people driving 45mph over cats, dogs, and small screaming children sport MD tags. On 295 they drive like Mel Gibson in da thunderdome. They are monsters. Everyone knows:

VA drivers: slow and angry, always in gridlock in their home territory, and in the city completely helpless (expect lots of irrational stopping when they think the streets are too narrow (even if there are two feet on either side)) and they will give their life to prevent you from merging

DC Drivers: They tend to drive in the average zone when compared to the tortoise and hare south and north of them. Sort of boring really.

MD Drivers: Get out of the way and hide your kids. You will get screamed at if you stop their 0-60 acceleration tests. Speedbumps used as ramps.

The upside, driving on Rt50 north to is always quick and easy.

Maryland, DC, Virginia, Rohan, Arrakis, whatever. We on DCist just sit here bitching, while the intrepid citizens of Southeast have come up with a series of demonproof checkpoints of which MPD is clearly jealous and getting help from WASA to shut them down--I'm convinced those hydrants have been blessed with crucifixes, ganeshan avatars, invisible pink unicorns, etc. and are therefore too effective at keeping MD's demonic horde out of SE to be allowed to succeed.

i don't know if maryland drivers are the devil (or more satanic than drivers from any other state or district for that matter) but i agree with the many comments above that they are left lane loafers and seem to love driving slowly in the passing lane... drives me FUCKING CRAZY when i'm driving north on 270 to visit home in PA -- especially after it condenses down to two lanes

DUH! Everyone knows the DC cabbies are the worst drivers in the city. MD and VA only play second fiddle.

What?! I live in MD, and I'll be the first to say there are some crazy mofo's up here, but if you want to see the real devils, head out to 66 or 395.

Every single time I run into sheer douchebaggery, like the usual "I don't care if I drive this every single day and know that people need to cross multiple lanes of traffic to get to your exit in 1/2 mile due to crappy freeway design, I will make damn sure to speed up and not let you into the lane for the fleeting second you need to be here" attitude it's always a Virginia plate. Always.

Never mind that I'm driving a carless DC person to Costco or Shopper's or anywhere else off Rt. 1 and need to be in your way for a second before I drop out of traffic entirely. It might as well be Gandalf in that SUV sticking his staff out and yelling "None shall pass me on my way to Applebee's".

Fuck you Virgina, I'll take my DC people to Beltsville before letting them spend money in your state.

And don't even get me started on the people who've mad mid-street U-turns into parking spot on Georgia Avenue. I know that white "No Taxation" plate when I see it.

Maryland drivers are crazy, and they will fucking kill you, but they're not the only ones.

Don't even get me started on how nobody in this metro area can merge or drive in the least bit of weather. NOBODY!!!!

~EEE~

MD drivers totally are evil. Also, they can't drive on their own stretch of interstate. There's nothing more frustrating than happily cruising through Jersey and DE at 75-80 MPH in traffic, then crossing into MD and suddenly dropping to 60-65 MPH. THE SAME CARS. Come on people, the speed limit there is 65, for pete's sake.

On the other hand, WTF is up with VA drivers who can't handle a stop sign? Or a traffic signal arrow? This behavior has driven me nuts ever since I moved here. Turns out, they apparently don't learn these useful skills.

When my sister was learning to drive I had to teach her these things and when I asked her what she'd been doing with her time in drivers' ed, she said that they weren't covered, and also weren't on the test. "No wonder," I sighed.

Arrakis drivers are probably the only ones who do know how to drive. Try learning to parallel park a mile-long sandworm while you're hopped to the gills on the spice Melange. That's some driving.

Harkonnens? ALL over the f***ing road, screaming and floating and leaking pus everywhere. And lose the vanity plate, fatso. "I-M-YR-DOOM"? Yeah, whatever, a**hole.

Yet you never hear a complaint about Guild Navigators. Always signal before they fold space. Always giving pedestrians the right of way. I just wish they tinted their windows a little more. Do you guys ALWAYS have to be playing porn on the DVD headrests?

The only cars I fear more than Maryland plates are the diplomatic plates (serif fonts on a plate are terrifying!). Actually, scratch that, the little horns popping out of MD drivers' heads trump immunity.

i am a secret philly driver in MD-tag disguise.

i know there are a few of us out there, i spot Eagles stickers on 50 all the time.

I think that this thread has generated so much conversation because it touches on one of the core values of Americans--driving. We drive with a "pedestrian ethos" in which the gas pedal is a new type of shoe sole. How else do you explain the incessant double parking, U-turns (guilty), and stop-start driving/talking to folks from your window on 16th St. and U at 5:45 p.m.?

In order for us to really investigate and develop an understanding of how we drive and how we can do so better, I recommend replacing Senior English and Civics in high schools with "commuter education."

Commuter education can be a double-block class taught by civics teachers (who in my school were PE coaches and drivers ed teachers, too) and drivers ed people, with a curriculum written with a grant from the National Endowment for the Humanities. I suggest that the curriculum committee be headed by Helio Castroneves, Daniel Goleman, any woman writing for Motor Trend, and someone who uses mass transit and can write. Maybe this dude.

I think this is a winning proposition. Seriously, do you care more if your fellow citizen remembers what a villanelle is, or when to hit their blinker?

Disclosure: former senior English teacher.

Oh, man. I LOVED that movie! Clint Eastwood at his best, with a delightful cameo by Jerry Lewis as "The A**hole."

yah, gotta wonder why it didn't take best picture.

Seriously, do you care more if your fellow citizen remembers what a villanelle is, or when to hit their blinker?

Never trust those at the wheel
Driving in from out of town
Is this not how we all feel?

One must ask “what is the deal?”
Of each and every suburban clown
Never trust those at the wheel

In the rugby scrum of Detroit steel
That we all call our downtown
Is this not how we all feel?

Their driving styles are unreal
From Manassas to Germantown
Never trust those at the wheel

“Fie upon the automobile!”
Is the DCist cry of renown
Is this not how we all feel?

Unlike panda porn, they don’t appeal
Like the Man, they keep us down
Never trust those at the wheel
Is this not how we all feel?

Yeah, the meter is sprung worse than I am when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in my face. But cut me some slack, villanelles are not the kind of poetic form you can knock out over a coffee break.

IMGOPH is totally right about the Grahamstander... He parks that little bug illegally everywhere and walks nowhere. He claims he needs his car at work because he has to go places, but Tommy Well rides his bike to work a lot...I guess he's not as important at the Grahamstander....who btw, one time drove his car into Kalorama Park, parked it and started to go somewhere nearby until the park director called him on it....

Doesn't this question depend on where you live? If you're from VA you'll say MD and if you're from MD you'll say VA. As someone who doesn't have a car and has lived in DC and VA I would say Beltway drivers are terrible in general. The best drivers I've seen are from California.

Hey Virginia! Learn to get your big, fucking Lexus minivan out of the left lane.

-Thx (the Devil)

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he did not exist and he wasn't Jim Graham.

And like that... he's gone.

Drawing any kind of distinction between the Maryland west suburbs of DC and the Virginia west suburbs of DC (driving habits of the people or otherwise) is asinine. The differences between Fairfax or Montgomery vs. PG are far starker than between Fairfax and Montgomery themselves; they're one uniform place spanning a state line.

Angrypenguin, that actually took only a couple of minutes. Villanelles aren't that hard to turn out on the fly if you're willing to overlook the meter. And when it comes to cheap doggerel, I'll overlook the meter harder than a DC cabdriver on May 31.

@ LanierHts. Your cockamamie plan will never work. We wouldn't want to clog up the internets just to get around.

Transit is not something you dump things on. It's not a big truck. And if you don't understand, those tubes can be filled and if they are filled, when you put your transit in, it gets in line and it's going to be delayed by anyone that puts into that tube enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material.

We should instead invest in building above the roads. I suggest a series of bridges.

Morning rush hours, Maryland drivers are the worst -- they are always late for work and like to take it out on Washingtonians.

PM rush hours, Virginia drivers are the worst -- they are horrified at the thought of being in DC after d-d-d-dark!

I'm talking about the d-bags the see a car coming and slow down to fuck with them, or the assholes that jump out in the middle of the block and take a sunday stroll through traffic acting like it's there god given right to saunter through a 45mph 3 lane road.

Pretty funny. You've just described me to a 'T' when I used to live in Adams-Morgan. Come to think of it, I probably beyatch-slapped your side-view mirror more than once sauntering across 18th & Belmont while getting my morning coffee. What you been up to?

This is dumb.

pop quiz for dc drivers!

a) do you know what that red octagonal sign means?
(10 pts)

b) do you know what to do when you come to an intersection that has one of these on each corner?
(25 pts)

fun trivia! contrary to popular rumor, it is not optional if it has a white border!