July 18, 2008
Funniest Headline of the Morning
What we love about this one is imagining the police department meeting that led to this sting. Surely it went something like this:
"Dude, I am so totally bored. I haven't arrested anyone in like, three days. Who can we arrest?"
"Uhh. Well hey, you know who really likes doing drugs? Jam band fans!"
"Perfect. This will be easier than busting a high school party for underage drinking. Let's roll."
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kinda pathetic. poor hippies.
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Did anyone else have to read that headline several times before making sense of it?
And try to say it 5 times fast. Superb job as always, NBC4!
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I lived in that part of Western Maryland when I was younger, and for years, that stretch of I-68 has been drug bust central. But most of Garrett County is populated by bible-thumping, ultraconservative farmers and the Amish, and the police there really have little else to do.
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I'm with you jen209 - I thought it was the "Funniest Headline of the Morning" because of the ridiculousness of structure. At first I thought it was talking about Jam Band Fest Traffic stopping something...
Almost every single word in that headline could legitimately be used as a verb!
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jen - Me too. I'd expect that kind of banter headline from a bunch of Brits. News of the World is always cooking up these indecipherable headlines. "Lembit Opik ditched by Cheeky Girl Girlfriend"!
Doody Family Fans of Mr. Brains Faggots!
My crack team of monkey cryptologists on crack has yet to decode that NBC4 headline. Developing...
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I have to admit that that hypothetical convo amongst officers was probably spot on.
Damn cops, do some real crime stopping and solving. Leave jam band fans alone!
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A better headline for this story would have been "Maryland Police Shoot Fish in Barrel"
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Word from a couple of buddies who attended is that the local cops use the even as a fundraiser -- pulling over cars for trivial infractions, bringing out the drug dogs, imposing steep fines (one concert-goer was reportedly fined an additional $500 for "paraphernalia," that being the baggie her pot was in. You want to talk to the judge about it? Thought not.) and sending them on their way without the hassle of locking people up.
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Dank, I think you might mean "Maryland Police Shoot Phish heads in Barrel". Not that Phish was playing (tough for a defunct band to do), but having been to that festival, that is definitely the crowd.
I will say that the year I went, the cops were pulling a lot of people on the way in, and yet the festival comprised the biggest open air drug market I have ever seen, and living in DC, that says something.