October 22, 2008
'No Candy' Maryland Sex Offenders, In Song
Reader Justin Enright enjoyed the story we pointed out last week about how Maryland was requiring convicted sex offenders to post signs on their homes that read, "No Candy at this Residence" in big, capital letters over a scary jack-o-lantern. He enjoyed it so much, in fact, that he wrote and recorded a little song about it. It's a sad ballad from the point of the view of the sex offender. The lyrics are deeply offensive and pretty entertaining, so we figured it was the perfect thing to share with DCist readers. Don't miss killer rhymes like, "Modern laws aren't fair/I'm banned from child care" and "A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do, even if the one you love is younger than you." Bravo, Justin.
Halloween Song, Justin Enright
UPDATE: Looks like the free MP3 host we used will only let us share 30 seconds of Justin's song, so hang in there while we post it a different way.
UPDATE 2: OK, that should do the trick.
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This is the worst thing to happen since Carly Simon rhymed "yacht" and "apricot" in "You're So Vain." FAIL.
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Okay, so things like this generally do not make me laugh, and I only listened to the 30 second clip, BUT this is pretty great.
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His voice is pretty.
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Fucking golden, Justin.
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oh jesus, the little ditty from "the entertainer" at the end was the icing on the cake. FAN-tastic!