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The Smithsonian museums around the National Mall have all been ordered to stay open on January 20 in order to provide potential shelter and bathrooms for the Inauguration Day throngs. Now comes this story about how museum employees plan to manage to be there to open up at 8 a.m. that morning: camp overnight at work. Yes, a number of workers at the National Museum of American History are planning a large slumber party the night before the inauguration, which is pretty cute (and considering the transportation nightmare of the next morning, also pretty smart). Too bad none of them will be returning home by Rolls Royce after a grand adventure investigating the origin of a beautiful statue.
Photo by Meaghan Gay
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I can think of no better use for a museum filled with priceless artifacts than a shelter and free bathroom for thousands of people who have been out in the cold/rain/snow for several hours. And if they run out of toilet paper, just use the paintings from the National Gallery of Art!
I;m going to say it. The planners of this event are so blinded by their euphoria over Obama that they have lost any ability to make sound decisions.
By the way, is anyone willing to let me park my car in their driveway for a few days so a tour bus from Missouri can idle in front of my house (which is on a designated bus parking only street) for two days? I mean come on, its all for Obama right?
I have to say, I was fine with the coming Obamapocalypse that was descending on the city next week, in fact I have been excited and looking forward to the swarming mass of non-district squatters, but recently I have realized something completely new to me- these out-of-town people may actually leave the mall! They may actually show up within view of our homes!
Now I am a bit scared. I was expecting the normal event drill; 1. Human mass enters from Virginia (the old orange/blue line thing) attacks the mall. 2. As soon as the final song starts, they leave out the same tunnel/road they came in on, stopping only at an Applebee's out past Sterling VA for a buffalo wing reload. Now I see some of these 'Mericans from outside the district are sleeping at work, descending all over the city, and may actually venture out in the neighborhoods! Say it ain't so.
I recently discovered that because of the massive bus parking at RFK, I may not even be able to walk to the mall, because I will be trampled by the mass exodus moving west as it crushes sidewalks and grinds me into the pavement. They will venture into our bars, our stores, make themselves at home, they will be bold and forget to flee in fear from any real parts of the city- in other words, chaos. We may run out of booze for gods sake. The prophecy has been foretold, and as with the snow, I am going to empty the safeways of bread, gin, and toilet paper.
I don't think you'll have much lunch emptying the safeways of gin...
I've volunteered with the Red Cross for the disaster response... odds are I'll be camping in my federal office if I'm assigned to downtown. Yay for CACs with 24x7 access!
No one has commented on the superb reference to E.L. Konigsburg's book - best kid's book ever!
Actually, I was looking forward to the descending hoards. I got so excited that I stocked up on toilet paper, milk, ex-lax (for the milk stockpile), hot pockets and vodka. And with the lifting of the gun ban, I had visions of camping out on my roof during inauguration week, shooting at the zombie hoard as the rumbled past.
Now that more realistic crowd estimates are coming in, I am scared that any of this won't happen. I am soooo disappointed. This is just like the time I found out that just because you take it in the butt doesn't mean that you are still a virgin. Ah, the mid-90's...
I'll be in Key West next Tuesday, sipping a drink and watching the riots on tv in a bar.
The priceless artifacts in the Smithsonian museums belong to the public. Their tax dollars, cafe purchases, etc support the preservation, exhibition, and interpretation of those valuable objects.
Museums should be open spaces where you can grab a coffee, use the restroom, read the newspaper, borrow the free wifi, relax--and even escape Inauguration crowds. If you feel like it, visit your favorite portrait or dinosaur.
If people feel uncomfortable in museums, what's the point? They're for the community!
No more austere palaces.