Overheard in D.C.: Passive Aggressiveness
Being a passive-aggressive jerk is great. No, really, it's totally great when you do it. Yeah, I love it.
Overheard of the Week
On MARC train from Baltimore:
A well-dressed man in a business suit is on a cell phone.
Man: “Hello, how is your day going?”
(Man listens to the phone)
Man: “Well, let me describe how the day will end: your clothes will be packed in boxes on the lawn, the locks will be changed, your car will be towed away."
(Audible yelling from the other end)
Man: “Well OK then.”
The man folds the phone and begins to read the paper.
After the jump, problems at work, skaters, and police cars.
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This kid: genius
At Pete's Barber Shop in Arlington:
A mother brings her 5-year-old son in to get a haircut.
Barber to the boy: "Do you have a girlfriend?"
[Boy shakes his head.]
Barber: "Are you gonna get married one day?"
[Boy shrugs.]
Barber: "Who are you gonna marry?"
Boy: "I'm gonna get married to picking my nose!"
Mother: "Sounds like a match made in heaven."
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Requisition? Does this happen a lot?
At Target in Columbia Heights:
Target employee over his walkie talkie: "Had a little situation here: I split my pants working on an end-cap. Can I requisition some pants?"
Other end of the walkie talkie: "Uh... yeah, if it's not too expensive."
Nearby employees start cracking up.
Another coworker, laughing: "I need to check!"
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Hear that fellas!?
In Tysons before Valentine's Day:
Two girls are shopping.
Girl 1: "I found a dress for Valentine's Day! The only problem is I have this rash that's on my shoulders I need to cover up."
Girl 2: "Oh, that's great! What does it look like?"
Girl 1: "Well it's like bumps that are white and spotty..."
Girl 2: "Ew, gross. I meant the dress."
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This is why there are skateboard videos, not skateboard books.
On the 14th Street bus at about 7 p.m.:
A kid with a skateboard on his cellphone: "The bank is as steep as some steep stairs, so it's pretty steep."
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An El Camino police car would be pretty awesome, however.
Outside of the D.C. courthouse, in front of a row of parked police cars:
Two women in their 20s or 30s are talking.
Woman #1: "When you become a cop, do they paint your car for you, or give you a new car?"
Woman #2: "Who? Chevy?"
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The new happy hour
At a hookah bar in Adams Morgan:
Mid 20s woman yelling to one of the staff from the entrance: "I'll be
right back, I'm getting my nipples pierced!"
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Or....
At 14th and Irving in Columbia Heights:
Girl to boyfriend: "Ooh, I want a wig like her hair!"
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And finally, everyone's dad at some point.
At Twinbrook Metro Station at 6:30 a.m.:
A family is waiting at the platform for the next train in the direction of Glenmont.
Mom: "Come on kids, the train is here."
Teenager: "Mom, why are there people dressed up so nicely?"
Mom: "Because they are going to a funeral."
Teenager: "I thought they drive, not take the subway?"
Mom: "People around here are old-fashioned. (pause) Their subway is too confusing, and the colors inside the train are ugly."
Dad: "Can't we all enjoy our trip and not bitch?"