Overheard in D.C.: Land of Wonders
D.C. can be a wondrous place for tourists. It's got magnificent architecture, history, museums, and bustling streets and sidewalks. There are people from all over the world, homeless people, military folks in uniform, police, politicians, black squirrels, and lots of well-scrubbed young people. There's the Metro, the Mall, and more. And it's tourist season, so maybe those fanny-pack wearing throngs standing in front of the escalators are just awe struck, rather than annoying. The greater D.C. metropolitan area can be too much to grasp sometimes. It can be amazing.
Overheard of the Week
On the Green Line near College Park, 6 p.m.:
Teenage tourist on cell phone with relative: "We're on the subway right now, going out to our hotel. There's an Applebees right there that we can WALK to!"
After the jump, teabag jokes, parenting, and important debates.
Send your overheards in! Tourists can be like a gold mine, but with fewer harsh chemicals and TNT. overheardindc(at)gmail(dot)com
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Coolest security guards ever?
At a Chinatown office building's security kiosk:
Two security guards are having a quiet conversation. One picks up the phone and dials.
Guard on the phone: "Hi [name], we're researching something very important up here." *pause* "Are you familiar with the movie Pootie Tang?"
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Draw your own conclusions
At a tea party protest in Annapolis:
Man with tea bags on his hat: "Should we eat around here or should we go somewhere good outside of town, like Denny's?"
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See, skateboarders are nice kids after all
On H ST NW:
Three skateboarders are rolling slowly down the sidewalk.
Skateboarder 1: "Asian Spice?"
Skateboarder 2: "Umm...no. That sounds like a porn name."
Skateboarder 3: "Yeah. Let's go someplace we could tell mom about."
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Mmm.
Family of tourists on 7th Street in Chinatown:
Young Daughter to Mom: "Mommy, what's that smell?"
Mom: "It's all of the Chinese food."
Daughter: "No! Smells like pollution."
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It's so obvious, but it's still funny
Orange line train near Federal Center SW:
Hill-type guy to another Hill-type guy: "So you gonna tea-bag today?"
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OK...
In line during lunchtime at Cosi in Dupont:
Two guys are standing in line talking about a coworker: "He tried to talk to me, and I was like, 'Do you think you're special because you're in a suit?' I don't respect him ever since he farted next to me in the bathroom. That's just not cool."
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Yay, parenting!
Waiting for a flight at National Airport:
Father to 5 or 6 year-old son: "Buddy, get over here. Buddy! NOW!!!"
(Kid timidly goes over)
Father: "Because you've been so good sitting over there and being
quiet, I'm going to give you some of this."
(Father holds out partially eaten candy bar. Kid starts to take a
bite.)
Dad: (Grabbing it back, furious) "Not half of it, you idiot!!! A
BITE!!"
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And finally -- good point.
On the X8 bus:
Man speaking into mobile phone: "Why don't you just get a key made? What? [whispering] Man, if you can buy cigarettes and sit around and do crack and drink beer, you can afford a damn key."