The Manhattan Project
Controversy Over Rhee Now to Include Sex, Congress
Report: CCDC Split From UDC Is "Critical To Success"
Increased Urban Walkability For The Win
D.C. United Icon Ben Olsen To Retire
I was all prepared to write about the unabated decline of retail in the heart of Cleveland Park (even the 7-11 is closing, people!), but a much more interesting topic about the area was thrust into the public eye yesterday: implications of latent racism on the neighborhood's listserv, which will, no matter what, always take precedent over the unfortunate disappearance of Go-Go Taquitos.
Frequent readers of the Cleveland Park listserv will immediately recognize what Colbert King was talking about in his WaPo column yesterday. Most days, there is at least one message from a neighborhood resident sounding the alarm on the presence of door-to-door salesmen, people with clipboards, or those who appear to be canvassing the streets with no clear intention or purpose. So what's the problem? Most, if not all, of those alerts involve black individuals:
[Listserv subscriber Larry] Irving said that every year, usually in the spring and summer, there is a series of "outrageous e-mails saying 'There are black people knocking on doors. They are burglars.' " He noted that as one of the relatively few black residents of Woodley Park, he hasn't sensed overt racism or racial antagonism from his neighbors. But, Irving added, "there is no reluctance on the part of people in a public forum, such as [the e-mail list], to bluntly note that people need to 'make note of young Black men in our neighborhoods,' 'take pictures of these people when you see them.' "
The listserv is consistently lauded as one of the best in the area and has provided hours of entertainment for those looking for catty debate over citizens associations and grocery store development.
In recent weeks, though, "neighborhood watch"-type postings to the list began to intensify, as the summer began and people began to hit the streets in greater numbers.
While some of the posts -- especially the one about the two well-dressed African-Americans with the copy of The Advocate making secret notes -- are destined for the Ridiculous Listserv Post Hall of Fame, the kind of disturbing trend that King and others have written about is easy to see. On the other hand, Cleveland Park has had its share of problems with break-ins with criminals often making three to five stops in one go on the same street -- strings of robberies that would be difficult to undertake without some sort of research.
In a follow-up email to the listserv today, Irving said the following: "I hope people in this community will continue to watch out for one another. Watching out for one another, however, should not require an assumption that any Black man you don't know constitutes a criminal threat."
That's true. But monitoring one of the whitest neighborhoods in a very non-white city has always been, and will continue to be, a challenge for Cleveland Park. Is it a problem? One could argue that it's always been a problem. The real question is whether or not there is a solution that straddles the middle line between vigilance and infringement -- hey, maybe all the residents should talk it over with a Slurpee or two.
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I don't know anything about vigilance or infringement, but that photo has a kickass Exorcist vibe.
Me neither, but wait until the folks in Cleveland Park realize there is a black man, just down the street, in the White House.
Can I tell 'em that their mayor is black, too? Huh? Huh? Can I? Can I? Pleeeeeze?
Go for it...
...because of course these posts prove that everyone in Cleveland Park is racist. Sigh, if only I were hip enough to have my parents pay my rent at one of those new condos in post-racial Columbia Heights.
If the Cleveland Park listserv is so great, why are they stuck on that horribly outdated and outmoded Yahoo! Groups board? It's unbearable.
And the 7-Eleven is closing? WTF??? I'm sure another bank or dry cleaners will be moving in there soon.
Banks and drycleaners are two sure-fire business models for Cleveland Park. Can you imagine the anarchy that would break out if the Cleveland Park cognoscenti could not have ready access to cash or excessively starched boxer shorts? It would make the Mount Pleasant "Uprising" look like cold consommé at a spinsterish tea party.
There have been some dopey, Chicken Little postings on that listserve (take photos of anyone that comes to your door! Call the police anytime someone rings your doorbell!).
But there have also been lots of reports of people doing odd things while in the neighborhood. It's one thing when a random door-to-door salesperson rings people's bells or knocks on their door. It's another when a person then tries the door handle, goes around the side of the house peering through windows, tries the back entrance to the house, tries to get into the garage, etc.
That's shady business, regardless of the skin color of the supposed salesperson.
Same thing for people who show up at people's doors claiming to be owed money for yardwork for a next-door neighbor or claiming to be raising money for some non-profit group (yet not knowing anything about what the non-profit is or having any ID). Again, that's shady business regardless of the person's skin color.
Are these same people responsible for break-ins in the same area? Maybe. Are they acting oddly when they're going around a person's property trying all the doors and peering through windows? Definitely. Should residents call the cops and alert their neighbors when they see such activity? Absolutely. Should they feel bad that it's apparently mainly black individuals who are getting reported for such behavior? Nope.
If there's a sudden surge in the number of white Mormon or Jehovah Witnesses going around the neighborhood and peering into people's windows and trying all the doors in a house, then would we be seeing accusations of racism?
No doubt some people are overreacting to the presence of black individuals walking around Cleveland Park. But there also appears to be little doubt that there are in fact some black individuals walking around Cleveland Park who are either casing homes for burglaries or are otherwise acting very suspiciously.
I'd much rather have a neighbor overreacting by posting a description of the person they think is acting suspiciously, rather than the p.c.-approved description of the person as being simply "a male wearing a shirt and pants."
It's another when a person then tries the door handle, goes around the side of the house peering through windows, tries the back entrance to the house, tries to get into the garage, etc.
Doesn't that pretty much happen in every neighborhood though? It's the main reason why intelligent people have their UPS packages delivered to them at work. There seems to be a culture of people who just walk around all day, swiping packages, looking for easy smash-and-grab opportunities. The Mayor's office needs to look into hiring these people to take care of the budget defecit. Certainly a lot more entertaining than a tax hike.
Should they feel bad that it's apparently mainly black individuals who are getting reported for such behavior? Nope.
There's a pretty thick line between this and "There are black people knocking on doors. They are burglars," or "make note of young Black men in our neighborhoods ... take pictures of these people when you see them."
It's similarly not wrong to say, "A person broke into such and such house. The person was male, 5'10, black, wearing a blue sweatshirt, etc." But what these people were saying amounts to "If someone you don't know knocks on your door, and the person is a black male, he wants to steal from you."
FOLKS: If a well-dressed black man that isn't me knocks on your door and asks you to go down on him, DON'T DO IT. It's a trick. I've read the warnings on the Cleveland Park listserv, and had I not, who KNOWS what might have happened when he knocked on my door last night at 8pm. You have to be really careful out there.
Oh! I did, however, order a 2-year subscription to In Touch® from him.
Fuck it, next time I'm on Cleveland Park I'm wearing my grass skirt and carrying a spear. I can't wait to see what shows up on the listserv that evening.
Nobody falls for the old "well-dressed man going door-to-door soliciting blowjobs" trick anymore, anyway. I know I wouldn't!
...unless there's a free magazine subscription in it for me.