Looking for an Investor With a Dremo
Alexandria Residents Allegedly Having, Considering Sex
Too Much H1N1 Vaccine? Or Too Many H1N1 Vaccine Clinics?
Via the DCist tipline, we learn that D.C. Mayor Adrian Fenty may actually face some "super" serious competition in his upcoming reelection campaign. A web site promoting Peter Parker, aka Spider-Man, for mayor of D.C. has popped up, along with the requisite Facebook page and Twitter feed.
So what does Spidey say he can do for us that Fenty can't? He offers a four-pronged platform naturally focusing first and foremost on crime ("Spider-Man has the experience and passion to protect the great citizens of our nation's capitol.") His other focuses include education ("... with a PhD in biochemistry, Spiderman understands the incredible value of affordable higher education,") health-care ("As an orphan brought up in the inner city in a single parent home, Spider-Man witnessed first hand the importance of community health programs to lower-income families and their children,") and transportation ("As mayor, the amazing Spider-Man will puch [sic] for developing late night metro routes all week long. He will also push for a larger web of metro routes.")
Spider-Man's key obstacle appears to be his belief that Election Day is actually this week, instead of the fall of 2010. The candidate is encouraging voters to cast their ballots online this Friday, July 10, from 7 a.m. to 6 p.m.
UPDATE: We are not surprised to learn, via the comments, that a strong female candidate has also emerged: Batwoman has also thrown her hat into the ring.
More: It looks like there are eight total NOI superhero candidates. A full list can be found here.
BTW, this web site is the product of a New Organizing Institute Bootcamp, which you can read more about here.
add to stumble upon
add to reddit
tweet this
post to facebook
personally, i prefer batwoman for mayor. say no to street cleaning tickets and yes to marriage equality!
The policies that Batwoman merely echo those of her younger, more active opponent: BatGirl.
Want proof?
See for yourself at BatGirl's Campaign Website.... Actions Speak Louder Than Words.
So which Batgirl are we talking about? Because if it's Yvonne">http://gedmaheux.files.wordpress.com/2007/12/batgirl.png">Yvonne Craig, I'm all over her like green on Marta.
I prefer to elect non-blood suckers or insects. Plus The Atom videos are hilarious!!!
http://www.youtube.com/user/atomfordc#play/uploads
Superman's webpage is hilarious!
He wants to "Institute term limits: Superman wishes to apologize for Superman III and Superman IV."
www.youaresuperman.com
I would vote for The Flamng Carrot.
Second Flaming Carrot for Mayor. Also, The Mysterymen would make a kickass City Council. You wouldn't see these guys stalking women, banning Jumbo Slice, or trying to turn off all the streetlights at night.
This brings up a good question: aren't there any superheroes based in Washington, DC? Why must we suffer these carpet baggers?!
Washington DC only gets the second-tier superheroes, like Cool "Disco" Dan, who can destroy entire walls with his ego. Then there's Captain White, the only superhero with the power to give you the crabs. Gotham City this ain't.
DC needs a Nick Fury or a Snake Plissken or Jack Burton. Instead, we get Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy (aka Jim Graham and Mayor Bullethead).
Blelvis is sort of a local superhero.
Or compliant man, or branch man on NY Ave (is he still around?)
What about Pigman?
Ha HA!! Charade you are!!!
Check out one of the other opponents
www.atomfordc.com
Hmmm...have you ever wondered why we never see Spiderman and Fenty together? Fenty's superhero-like athleticism, his unexplained absences, the way Spidey's mask hugs his skull...kind of makes you think, doesn't it?
So you're saying Fenty was bitten by a radioactive jackass which gave him super question-dodging powers? You've made a powerful enemy today, my friend. One who can vanish into thin air over the weekend and not be held accountable.
I still say Fenty and Lamont Cranston are the same person. It's the only way he's able to cloud men's minds.
Radioactive Jackass is biting people again? Last I heard, he was on meds for that.
Oh yeah? Check this out. The resemblance is uncanny. He is even wearing fetishwear-just like Spidey.
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3108/2855759489_d2c5b5f662.jpg?v=0
Green Lantern is a hero who is in touch with the people. He is the only candidate with experience eliminating crime from the streets of DC, most recently by foiling the plots of Council Member Marion Barry
While I may disagree with The Green Lantern's fiscal policies, I have to say that he runs one of the hottest bars in town. And any candidate that can take on The Raging Goatse and his sidekick The Gloryhole Kid has got my vote.
HILARIOUS videos from The Atom:
http://www.youtube.com/user/atomfordc
DCist has biased coverage!
DCist FAVORS SPIDERMAN!
I'm blowing the whistle on this!
Spidey's radioactive powers do not require him to train 20 hours a week, commission pool rehabs for personal use on the public dime and basically phone in his day job in order to maintain his powers. Advantage webslinger.
Marion Barry will kick Spidey's ass.