Overheard in D.C.: Vaguely Dirty Edition
Maybe it's getting hot out and people are caring less or wearing less clothes or something, because a lot of submissions this week are vaguely (or overtly) crude. And sometimes also very confusing.
Overheard of the Week
Saturday around 11 p.m. at Mr. Smith's in Georgetown:
A man in his mid-30s is talking to the bouncer: "I just had sex with my wife two hours ago! [pause] But, yeah, she's still in the hospital."
Sharing is caring! Send your overheards to overheardindc(at)gmail(dot)com.
------
It really does happen
At the Banneker Rec Center kiddie pool last weekend:
A 6 year-old boy, loudly: "I just peed on myself, y'all!"
------
Tourist or resident?
Outside Columbia Heights Coffee at 10 a.m. on a Thursday:
Middle-aged guy to straggling 2 year-old girl: "Hurry up, [girl's name], or one of the crackheads will get you."
------
Kids say the darnedest things, or something
In the men's room at a Nationals game:
One 4-year-old to the other, referring to the urinal: "I want to use this toilet, it's my favorite."
Then he stops and points at the other 4-year old and says "That's a pretty cool penis!"
------
Romance is in the air
On the Orange Line to Ballston:
Young woman after finishing quick cell phone call: "I said, 'Love ya' to my boyfriend. He just said, 'See ya' back."
Young woman #2: "At least you get that. My girlfriend just hangs up on me. Mid-sentence."
------
Sometimes I think there should be a basic monument test for all tourists.
On an early a.m. flight from National, a middle-aged woman is speaking very loudly to her father:
Woman: "What is that dome monument all lit up?"
Father: "That's the Jefferson Monument."
Woman: "Oh, so why does he's get two? This one and the one where he is sitting down?"
------
You know, the Olympic sport!
At the Mos Def concert at the 9:30 Club:
Mid 20s woman: "Skeet skeet skeet!? What the fuck is that about!"
------
Kid 1 - Dad 0
At the Zoo on Saturday afternoon:
Tourist father and 8 year old son walk up to the Asian Fishing Cat cage.
Son (excited): "Look! It's a Fishing Cat."
Father: "No. It's a...(reads signs) Fishing Cat."
Son: "Told you."
------
Cue Beavis and Butthead. "Heh heh."
In line at Mr. Yogato, Tuesday night:
Girl behind the counter reading the order slip: "Soft and little. Who's soft and little?"
Guy in line: "That's me!!"
------
You're sort of one-quarter of the way right?
Summer interns at a backyard campfire near 15th and U NW last Saturday:
Intern 1: "...and then we went over to the 9:30 Club."
Intern 2: "The 9:30 Club. Isn't that in like Northeast?"
Intern 1: "No. It’s only a few blocks from here. They named it that because it’s at 930 V Street."
------