The Weekly Feed: Experimentation Edition
Morning Roundup: Change Edition
Former Blade Staffers Launch 'DC Agenda'
D.C. Insurance Dept. Denies Birth Control Coverage Meddling
Controversy Over Rhee Now to Include Sex, Congress
I only made it through watching about 3 1/2 hours of Monday's D.C. Council hearing on the same-sex marriage bill before I had to call it a night, and the majority of speakers I heard supported the legislation. Gay, straight, and religious leaders alike came forward to share moving personal stories about what it would mean for the longtime committed same-sex couples in their lives to finally be able to marry. But there were plenty of opponents among those who testified as well. Many cited their anger that the bill's passage appeared to be a foregone conclusion, since it already has enough co-signers to clear the full Council. Others referenced deeply held religious beliefs that marriage can only be between one man and one woman. The tone of the evening ranged from reasoned discourse to tears to outright shouting.
There's still another 168 speakers set to appear next week, but Metro Weekly offers a pretty good candidate for the most outrageous speaker of the hearing so far. Ernestine Copeland (or possibly Copelander) just happened to be the last individual to offer public testimony on Monday, sitting down to the microphone a little before 11 p.m. Among the highlights of her statement: calling Ward 6 Council member Tommy Wells (D) a "demon," and suggesting that not even dogs should be allowed to consort with other dogs of the same gender. Video of her testimony, courtesy Metro Weekly, is below.
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It's pretty well documented that 51 species of animals engage in homosexual behavior, not including animals like Jim Graham. Whether this is just the natural order of things or a crisis of Biblical proportions, I leave that up to more brilliant minds than mine to resolve. All this tells me is that goose-stepping morons should try reading books instead of burning them.
And while we're anthropomorphizing, let's remember the ex-gay animals among us.
I wish my God was a Fur God too.
The ultimate case of "I learned everything I know from my dogs".
I have a question for the group. Is Ernestine:
a) Bat Shit Crazy
or
b) Stripper Crazy?
The woman who testified before this woman was even more entertaining, in a train wreck sort of way. She wasn't irate or anything. She simply showed pictures of her wedding and then rattled off non sequiturs that had nothing to do with the matter at hand as Mendelson and Catania looked on with furrowed brows.
My God double-parks in front of his house of worship and dares the devil to give him a ticket.
Oh I would pay SERIOUS money to have a glance at her notes! I'm sure they're interesting... Then again, that piece of paper could be her shopping list.
I'm really curious about the pictures being held up beside Ms. Ernestine. What were they!?
The pics were the same ones the previous woman used during her ramble. Both women seemed to know each other. The penultimate woman continued to treat the final woman like a preacher, and performed a bit of a call-and-response routine. Luckily, the microphones were eventually silenced by Council staff; otherwise, Ms. Copeland would've likely kept on going until security dragged her from the building.
I was the person who testified immediately before the final two women - oddballs, both - so I got to see that they were family pictures and a very toner-heavy bit of "scripture" resembling the label on Dr. Bronner's castile soap.
The real shame is that these people are worshipping the WRONG JESUS. They're following the whining, mewling schoolmarm Jesus. I worship the Jesus that DIDN'T GET NAILED. That's right. The Fightin, Fartin, Fistf**kin Jesus.
Check out this footage from the anti-gay rally in DC the day before:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHpvIK295TA&feature=player_embedded
Some winning lines include:
"Same sex marriage will lead to the extermination of the human race"
"How can we tell our kids not to some marijuana when we tell them sodomy is ok"
"We need to live in a civilized society with man and woman, no clones!"
"Same sex marriage discriminates against homosexuals"
"Don't turn DC into Sodom and Gomorrah"
"Same sex marriage discriminates against homosexuals"
Was supposed to say SSM discriminates against heterosexuals