Overheard in D.C.: Driving Lessons
It's an age old debate: who's worse, Maryland or Virginia drivers? Of course, they both would say D.C. drivers, but then again, D.C. drivers seem to know how circles operate and that pedestrians get right of way. Well, some of the time. And at least these guys know your hands go on the wheel.
Overheard of the Week
In Arlington DMV a few mornings ago:
Guy 1 is explaining to a friend he ran into why he was there.
Guy 1: "They failed me because I had my hands in the wrong place on the steering wheel."
Guy 2: "Yeah, you're supposed to have them at 4 and 5."
Guy 1: "No, it's like 7 and 3."
After the jump, bars, neighborhoods, and Metro cars.
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Foreign languages are hard
At work in Old Town:
Co-worker pops into an office: "What is Mexican for taco?"
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Insert pahk the cah joke here
On the 42-ART Bus towards Ballston:
Two acquainted commuters, one older lady, one younger guy.
Lady: "I think our new driver just said 'Boston' not 'Ballston.'"
Guy: "As long as we don't end up in Roxbury, I'm perfectly okay with that."
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I believe you are thinking of Spencer Gifts
In the clearance section at the Columbia Heights Target:
A mid-30s woman is talking to what appears to be her husband and mother.
Woman: "Remember when we was online and we saw those shirts that said 'I love boobs' or 'I'm a boob man?'"
Man: "Yeah."
Woman: "I wish they had those here." (Mother walks up.) "Hey remember those shirts..."
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Attention gentlemen: get thee to Wonderland
Last Thursday around 9 p.m. on 11th Street near Wonderland:
A preppy 20-something girl in pearls loudly to her friend: "Hey, did you see CNN?! Did you hear about the HIV vaccine?! You should get it!"
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British humor? Or British creepy?
On a packed Blue Line train to the U2 concert:
Woman, mid-20s: "Awesome! Can you believe we're all going to the concert? I'm so excited!"
She turns to a stranger: "Are you excited?!"
Guy replies in a British accent: "I'm not going to the concert. I just like being touched."
The crowd makes room for him.
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Everyone in Dupont cringes at once
In northeastern Dupont, near U Street:
A group of stylish, yuppie, older women are walking.
One points to a random brownstone: "Oh it's just like Georgetown! It's a little Georgetown!" The others agree.
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I cede the remainder of my time to the gentleman from ACORN
Outside the Rayburn House Office Building:
"You know what? If you want to be a pimp, I'll tell you how to cheat on your taxes."
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And this week's Professor Genius award goes to
At the Maryland Renaissance Festival over the weekend:
A group of drunk 20-somethings walk up to a glass vendor.
20-something guy looking at Hebrew etching on glassware: "They had Jewish people in the Renaissance?"