The Real World D.C.: The Morning After, Pt. 4
That's four episodes down of The Real World D(upont) C(ircle). Last night's installment of the long-running reality show was chock full of material, so let's get straight to the bullet points, below the jump. (If you need to catch up, here are our recaps of the premiere and episodes two and three.)
- The opening scene is a pool party that looks more like Miami than it does D.C. Soo...they're at the Capitol Skyline Hotel.
- Andrew is hitting on pretty much every lady there. He exudes a creepy sexual predator vibe. There. I said it.
- Mike and Ashley go to church, presumably to seek the Lord's guidance on what in-house drama would make for better ratings.
- B-roll shot of the Masonic Temple on 16th Street. I knew the producers were Freemasons. Dan Brown would eat this shit up.
- Still waiting for Josh to make an appearance. Does he have a day job we're not being told about?
- Dinner and drinks at the Big Hunt! (So far, they've stuck to Rhino and Third Edition.) Well, I used to like that bar. They get hassled by the regulars. OK, I like the bar again.
- Mike and Ashley fight. Mike accuses Ashley of being mean. Ashley accuses Mike of not sticking up for her. So this is the type of drama God thought would make the show a little more interesting?
- Mike says he wants to get to know the locals and the area. That's...weirdly...sweet.
- Erika, as a fellow redhead, I have to tell you that yellow is simply not your color.
- Josh, Andrew and Ty find gift certificates for Nellie's Sports Bar. Sports? Bar? GUYS NIGHT OUT.
- Oh no! Those crafty MTV producers tricked them into going to a gay sports bar!
- Opines Josh: "We walked into the lion's den without even knowing it." Bravo, Josh. We haven't heard from you since the "letting the beast out of the cage" line during the premiere, yet you live up to your reputation with another fabulous one-liner.
- They take the Metro home. Damn! The producers really cut the leash, didn't they? A U Street bar? The Metro?
- Pardon the interruption, but did anyone else see that The Nation actually reviewed The Real World D.C.?
- The girls decide they want to make Andrew a nicer, sweeter and more successful sexual predator.
- Andrew heads out to Rhino Bar with newfound skills in hand, and yes, lands himself a lady.
- She comes home. She meets the roommates. Her name is Alli, or as Callie points out, "Like Callie but without the 'C'!"
- They head to bed. He tries to force himself upon her. No dice.
- She leaves the next morning, having successfully taught Andrew that no means no. He's not happy.
- "Nothing about spooning is comfortable for me," says Andrew. Discuss.
- "It's hard to seal the deal in the town," offers Andrew. Discuss.
- A few days later, Andrew and Alli meet for lunch. Nothing much comes of it.
- And yet a few more days later, Andrew invites Alli over. She comes. With her cousin.
- Alli and Andrew head to bed, leaving anonymous cousin to sleep on the couch.
- Again, Andrew is denied.
- "It just bums you out when you spend the whole night with an erection," says Andrew after Alli and cousin leave. Discuss.
- The roommates head to Russia House. I don't ever remember what happens when I go there other than always being terrified by the bouncers.
- Ashley picks another fight with some locals. Jeez, it's Ashley vs. D.C. here.
- Ashley and Mike fight. Again. Just to clarify, I'm on Team Mike.
- Andrew calls Alli. She tells him she's writing him an email. He asks what it says. She won't say. They hang up. He reads the email. She's broken up with him. Over email.
- Mike and Ashley fight. Once again.
- But now they make up. And they go into the confessional room together, where the predictable footage of them having make-up sex is edited out for use in "The Real World D.C., Unrated Director's Cut" DVD, available everywhere March 23!
- Oh snap! Next week is all about Josh! Finally we get to see the beast let out of its cage, and it's looking to be sleazy!
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