Overheard in D.C.: Obvious Questions
Sometimes MPD officers are accused of having a short tempter, say for pulling out a gun at a snowball fight or arresting a ton of people for protesting without actually telling them to stop. But they also have to deal with some dumb ass questions.
Overheard of the Week
At 19th and R Streets NW a few days ago:
A policewoman is tying yellow police tape between two poles on R street to keep people from driving down.
Woman driving van: "Excuse me, I can't turn down here?"
Policewoman: "No, ma'am."
Policewoman to passerby: "That's why I'm tying up this yellow tape across the street! I mean shit!"
Passerby: "You tell it, girl."
After the jump, old ladies, kids, and lame sex jokes.
If you hear something good, be the envy of your peers and send it in! Overheardindc(at)gmail(dot)com.
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Cool or crazy? You decide
Boarding the Red Line train at Silver Spring heading downtown:
A mid-20s male almost bumps into old lady as they both board train.
Male: "Excuse me."
After a bit of a pause, old lady turns around and yells, "Get out of my way, Asshole!"
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Kids, keeping parents honest
At the AMC Courthouse movie theater:
A woman with her little daughter are at the booth to buy a ticket.
The mother asks for one to see The Tooth Fairy and then asks if she needs to get one for her daughter, who is three. The cashier says that children above the age of two have to get tickets.
Daughter: "But Mom, I'm four!"
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That's what she said?
Lunchtime in an office breakroom:
Woman to a female friend: "He didn't seem so short from a distance."
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There's a story for the grandkids
Walking along Pennsylvania Ave. near Washington Circle:
Girl 1: "... and then I blacked out and I don't remember anything from last night."
Girl 2: "Well, that's how I met my last boyfriend!"
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Interesting sales technique
Outside the Giant in Van Ness:
A man is selling Street Sense.
Man selling Street Sense: "Would you like to buy Street Sense?"
Passerby: "No thank you."
A moment later, the seller flatulates loudly: "Awww, bless my ass."
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Good thing he wasn't playing Snow, the guy who did "Informer"
In Northeast D.C. last Sunday:
An SUV with blaring rap music turns into an unplowed side street and gets stuck. A man walks over to offer a push, asking if he needs help.
Driver, yelling over the music, "I don't need no help! I got front wheel drive and Tupac!"
It takes him five more minutes of forward and reverse tire spinning before he finally gets unstuck, then goes down one more block and gets stuck again.
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Way to give your kid a complex!
Rush hour on a crowded Green Line train the Friday most people went back to work:
Woman, sitting, to 7-year-old son: "This is why mommy doesn't take the train. I hate to be touched."
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Hey-o!
Night time on H Street:
A young couple are trudging to their car.
Guy: "Do you need me to pull out?"
Girl: "No, I'm good."