The first-ever Landmark Festival will take place in D.C. on September 26th and 27th. “Finally, a big music festival in D.C.!” people cheer. “I don’t have to risk my life to carpool with Craigslist strangers to go to Merriweather Post Pavillion!” We know, young rebel. We feel your pain.
Featured in the fest are Drake, The Strokes, Alt-J, Chvrches, Chromeo, Band of Horses, Nate Reuss, Wale, Dan Deacon, Ex Hex, The Kills, and so many more. It’s a bulletproof lineup, really. Fans of all genres should be stoked for this.
The angle isn’t just that it’s in D.C. proper—the site’s banner reads: “All for a cause.” Yes, somehow a Canadian artist is headlining a festival to “restore our voice, values, and history” and fix up “America’s Front Yard.”
The event is a collaboration between event producers C3 Presents and the non-profit Trust for the National Mall, which is raising awareness and funds for much-needed repairs to the Mall. Because everyone knows that the best way to restore a large grassy area is to invite tens of thousands of people to trample and vomit on it.
So, the combination of CVRCHES and feel-good fundraising sold you? There are a number of many ticket options, but luckily for you, DCist is here to help sort through them.
“First-In 2 Day Pass”: $100. These are already sold out. If you bought these, you’re a smart person. Though you may have also wasted $100 because remember when your mom mentioned she’d like to visit you this year, sometime after the tourist season is over? Yeah, she’s going to only be able to come on September 26th and 27th.
“Early Bird 2 Day Pass”: $150. These are the same as the First-In 2 Day Pass, but they are available now and cost more money.
“Advanced 2 Day Pass”: $175. These are the same as the Early Bird 2-Day Pass, but are available later and cost more money.
“Regular 2 Day Pass”: $200. These are the same as the Advanced 2 Day Pass, but are available later, cost more money, and tell everyone that you are a Regular. Not the almost-alcoholic kind of regular that frequents your neighborhood bar. Just a Regular person.
“Single Day Pass”: $105. Available this summer. Buy this if spending two days shoulder to shoulder with sweaty people on the Mall sounds like one day too many.
“VIP Pass”: $900. Yes, seriously, $700 is the difference between a Regular person and a VIP person? Holy crap. Looks like the VIP Pass gets you catered buffets twice daily, “specialty libations,” lounge seating in a VIP-only area (because really, if I’m paying $900 for this, I want to be sitting as far from the action as possible), and mini spa treatments. Buy this if you’d like to get a really expensive manicure on the Mall.
“Platinum Package”: $2350. This includes air-conditioned lounge seating in a Platinum-only area (thank goodness they keep the VIP area and the Platinum area separate—could you imagine what might happen were they to mingle?), access to artist lounge areas (pray for the artists), a gift bag, and complimentary bar and meals. All that for more than two grand?
Wait… what’s this? I forgot one detail…. oh. Oh my. Wow. Now that price makes sense. “Air conditioned restrooms.” So, the biggest difference between the VIP Pass for $900 and the Platinum Package for $2350 is that the VIPs don’t get access to air-conditioned bathrooms. Their sweaty butts will slip off un-air-conditioned toilets! But at least it’s all for a cause.
