Photo by Bill Jones Jr.

• Mark Whitaker has been named to replace Tim Russert as head of NBC News’ Washington Bureau. [AP]
• Funniest Twitter comment from the Los Angeles earthquake earlier today: “I am totally serious. My Ob/Gyn was IN my vagina and an earthquake started rattling the room!” [LAist]
• D.C. police are investigating a suspicious death of a 12-year-old girl found dead on Hawaii Ave. in Northeast. [NBC4]
• “You know, even my boyfriend needs permission to get that close, so having a perfect stranger attempt access so suddenly, so completely out of the blue, triggered my fight-or-flight response. And I *fight*. Did it hurt when I grabbed your collar and punched you in the head? I’m a little worried that I didn’t get enough momentum in my swing to make you feel it, seeing as I’m kinda short (5’2″). But you must have felt bad when you took off running and I chased you down so easily – it’s not that you’re slow, dude, it’s just that I run fast, as you might have suspected from the well-muscled form of my posterior, had you been viewing it with its athletic potential in mind.” [Craigslist via City Desk]
• Gilbert Arenas has a million dollar swimming pool, featuring a mural of himself in front of the U.S. Capitol building. And you don’t. [D.C. Sports Bog]
• Chix at 11th and U Streets NW may be about to open up patio seating where they can serve beer and wine. [Prince of Petworth]