Austin Kearns

Let’s engage in a hardball hypothetical, shall we? Player A is a 25-year-old outfielder, hitting .244 with 6 HR, 30 RBI, and 18 runs. Not the greatest stats, but Player A is generally appreciated by the fans, and has moderate-to-good defensive capabilities, even though he might be slightly late to practice once in a while. On the other hand, Player B is a 29-year-old outfielder on the decline. Player B is currently batting .197 with only 3 HR and 16 RBI in 58 games, even though he has a reputation as a power hitter — somehow, this power hitter’s slugging percentage is lower than his poor on-base percentage. Player B is a defensive liability most of the time acceptable defensively, but strikes out nearly a third of the time he comes to the plate. Player B is also generally understood to be grossly overpaid.

Judging by these statistics, who would you send to the minors to make room on the roster for two new players you acquired in a trade? Well, if you’re the Nationals, you’ve opted for Player A — Elijah Dukes — to Triple-A Syracuse, and left Player B, Austin Kearns, up with the big boys. Go figure.