Washington, D.C., at least in the federal sense, is constantly represented on the big screen. Oh, sure, these films are almost never actually shot here anymore, save a few establishing shots. (Though capital skylines composed of digital meringue are increasingly common; hello, Olympus Has Fallen.) Still, while they may not be made here, there are plenty of timeless movie moments that have a cherished place in the collective memory of this city.
But, yeah, too many of those moments are built on phony grandeur. The following list contains some of our favorite movie scenes set in D.C. as it is best seen in cinema—in chaos, on fire, being demolished by alien life, and wracked by mayhem. Oh, you were expecting something sweet and sunny like Forrest and Jenny in the Reflecting Pool or Aaron Sorkin’s high-falutin’ bullshit from The American President? Nah, none of that hope-y, change-y crap here. It’s blockbuster season, people. If D.C. is good in the movies, it’s probably because we’re fucked.
What an alien invasion might actually look like.
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INDEPENDENCE DAY: It’s probably good to get this one out of the way first. But as discussed during White House Annihilation Week, Roland Emmerich’s 1996 alien invasion blockbuster remains the pinnacle of laying waste to the nation’s capital. President Bill Pullman wants to keep the public calm while making first contact with an extra-terrestrial species that arrives in a fleet of 15-mile-wide saucers? Yeah, good luck with that buddy. You know how this one goes. Seventeen years on, the six seconds it takes for that cobalt energy beam to turn the White House into a splintering inferno remains the executive mansion’s finest moment in movie history. —Benjamin R. Freed
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Fox Searchlight Pictures
THANK YOU FOR SMOKING: Near the end of Jason Reitman’s underappreciated dramatization of the Christopher Buckley novel Thank You For Smoking, Aaron Eckhart’s character—Nick Naylor, a spokesman for Big Tobacco—is thrown into a van and covered with nicotine patches by masked terrorists who oppose his line of work. After being found naked at the Lincoln Memorial, Naylor is taken to a hospital, where it’s revealed that his heavy smoking actually saved his life. While some D.C. residents get sick of the city being associated with lobbyists and politicians, Thank You For Smoking‘s satirical look at the culture is too enjoyable to pass up. The film also gets bonus points for actually filming scenes in D.C. —Sarah Anne Hughes
We could not find a clip of this scene, so here’s the congressional testimony scene that follows it.
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EARTH VS. THE FLYING SAUCERS: A planet full of docile, unsuspecting humans is going about the quotidian and all of a sudden—space invaders in flying saucers! This 1956 science-fiction shocker looks ridiculous by the standards of today or, hell, even the 1980s, but it is perfect for its era. The movie, released at the height of McCarthyite paranoia, could have just as well been titled Earth Vs. the Flying Communists. Ordinary weapons are futile against the invaders; it takes a U.S. military super-weapon to bring them down. But not before three symbols of democracy—U.S. Capitol, Union Station, and the Washington Monument—get rammed, toppled, and castrated. —Benjamin R. Freed
Here’s the trailer:
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TRANSFORMERS: DARK OF THE MOON: I’ll admit, I walked out of an advance screening of this clunker when it debuted in 2011, but I later heard the dénouement took place in a desiccating Chicago. Still, I caught enough of Michael Bay’s third Transformers outing to see the Washington parts, including a turncoat, Leonard Nimoy-voiced robot sit his giant, shiny, metal ass down on the Lincoln Memorial; Shia LaBoeuf’s loft apartment on the part of K Street NW that looks like a Los Angeles backlot; and a car chase from Northern Virginia to the Walter E. Washington Convention Center by way of Chicago’s Lake Shore Drive. But D.C. should remember most about Transformers: Dark of the Moon isn’t the added-skyscraper skyline Michael Bay gave us or even the skewed geography; it’s the actual mayhem Bay’s production company caused while they were here. Yes, this movie was made during a brief period under the Fenty administration in which D.C. had a film incentive fund. After spotting a would-be paparazzo taking his picture while he sipped coffee, star Shia LaBoeuf gave chase and threw his hot beverage on the photographer.
And if that wasn’t enough, the Chevrolet Camaro playing LaBoeuf’s pet Autobot slammed right into a Metropolitan Police Department cruiser that was guarding the cordoned-off shooting area. —Benjamin R. Freed
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Warner Bros. Pictures
MARS ATTACKS!: Another global alien invasion? Sure, why the hell not. But unlike Independence Day‘s American machismo or Earth Vs. the Flying Saucers‘ anti-Communist hysteria, it’s Tim Burton’s campy, ’50s throwback sci-fi laugher Mars Attacks! that finally shows what happens when a full-fledged Martian invasion takes over Washington. When the brainy, svelte-framed aliens finally take control of the White House, it’s all out carnage: Dozens of the little green men destroying everything and everyone in sight with their sophisticated laser guns. All the while tour groups, staffers, and President Jack Nicholson, First Lady Glenn Close, along with their Secret Service detail, desperately try to escape. During the mayhem the two teenaged sons of Jim Brown’s character manage to get their hands on a couple Martian laser guns and take out some of the baddies, but not before a stray shot hits a chandelier and crushes Glenn Close in a comically brutal fashion. FLOTUS down! FLOTUS down! And bonus points for having Pam Grier portray a Metrobus driver and actual D.C. resident who, well, OK, it’s still Pam Grier. —Matt Cohen
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Focus Features
BURN AFTER READING: In this town, everybody’s trying to get ahead, by whatever means necessary and no matter how nefariously. But once in a while, you come across a legitimate do-gooder who just wants to help his friends. That’s Richard Jenkins’ schlub of a gym manager in the Coen brothers’ 2008 intelligence caper Burn After Reading. While it’s far from the Coens’ best, or even median, work, it does impart an invaluable lesson about Washington: No good deed goes unpunished here. For instance, if you try to cover the tracks left by your co-worker/crush object Frances McDormand, you will most likely wind up with John Malkovich shooting you in the chest and burying a hatchet in your face. —Benjamin R. Freed
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MR. SMITH GOES TO WASHINGTON: Don’t be alarmed. We’re not going soft here. You know that filibuster scene at the end that everybody thinks is the best cinematic representation of American government? It’s actually the worst, and the most dangerous. Just look at the Senate today. This whole country is getting filibustered into inertia. They can’t even get 60 votes to order lunch. You could pin it on stone-age Republicans and pansy-ass Democrats, but I choose to blame Jimmy Stewart. —Benjamin R. Freed
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D.C. CAB: The whole thing. —Benjamin R. Freed
