Via Shutterstock.

The first major festival to hit the National Mall is almost here, and the Park Service wants concertgoers to remember: smoking pot on federal land is illegal, selfie sticks are obnoxious, and drones never end well.

They are among the long list of prohibited items at the two-day Landmark Festival happening this weekend. And per a recent ruling, e-cigarettes are banned all places that regular cigarettes are prohibited, which includes the Mall. The other banned items include:

• Coolers of any kind (exceptions may be made for medical use)
• Firearms
• Marijuana
• Chairs of any kind
• Alcohol or kegs of any kind
• Any and all professional audio recording equipment (at the screener’s discretion)
• Large professional detachable zoom lenses, stands, monopods, tripods, attachment sticks (selfie sticks) or other commercial photography equipment (at the screener’s discretion)
• Any and all professional video equipment. No video recording is allowed (at the screener’s discretion)
• Aerosol containers, including sunscreen and personal beauty products
• Drones or any other remote flying device
• Glass and metal containers of any kind
• Illegal and illicit substances of any kind
• Laser pointers
• Outside food or beverage (including alcohol) of any kind, except two factory sealed bottles of water (up to 1 liter each)
• Pets (except service animals)
• Professional radios or walkie-talkies (at the screener’s discretion)
• Selfie sticks
• Skateboards, scooters, bicycles, wagons, carts or any personal motorized vehicles (wheelchairs and scooters for use by patrons with mobility disabilities are permitted)
• Tents, canopies or shade structures of any kind
• Unauthorized/unlicensed vendors are not allowed. No unauthorized solicitation and material including handbills, flyers, stickers, beach balls, give-aways, samples, coolers with any messaging etc.
• Weapons or explosives of any kind
• Fireworks
• Large chains or spiked jewelry
• Bicycles inside festival grounds (free parking is available near festival entrance)
• Framed backpacks
• Hammocks
• Ladders
• Any item deemed inappropriate by security or U.S. Park Police

If you aren’t subjecting yourself to the flower crowns and full crowds, plan to avoid the Mall like the plague the pope is coming again (you can watch the whole thing live on Yahoo.) But if you are planning to partake in the misery of driving around the area for some reason, keep in mind the following roads will be closed.

West Basin Drive SW from Independence Avenue SW to Ohio Drive SW
Closed from 9:30 a.m. September 25 through 9 p.m. September 28

Ohio Drive SW from 23rd Street SW to Inlet Bridge
Closed from 6 a.m. September 25 through 9 p.m. September 28