By DCist contributor Gabrielle Tillenburg

For the eleventh year in a row, a Rosslyn park temporarily became a giant outdoor obstacle course for a parkour festival. And, well, it definitely made me feel unprepared to handle a zombie apocalypse.

Held in Gateway Park, beginner and professional, um… parkourers(?) came together for a weekend long jam session at Beast Coast 2016. The main event, a Fast Contest, ran timed competitors through a course that went a little something like this:

Don’t fall off this beam
Jump off this really high platform
Don’t hit your head on that pole
Slide under this really low bar
Jump over this beam
Crawl up a wall

If shutter speed settings are any indication, the contest participants were fast… really fast. While it’s certainly how human bodies should work, at least in the context of having to outpace large predators, the competitors demonstrated amazing physical accomplishments (including making me commit to going to the gym).

Being totally unfamiliar with the sport, I half-expected a mass of bros to yell “Parkour!” at every jump and flip. So I was pleasantly surprised to find the environment unintimidating and inclusive. That didn’t necessarily mean that I was going to try it on a 90 degree day, but I was made to feel like I could backflip off of a wall if I wanted to. Contest participants were applauded and encouraged when they tripped, didn’t make it up a wall on their first try, or took a pole to the face (yes, it happened, and yes, they were okay) and received compliments from a French athlete shouting “Niiiace” and “Zhat’s fahst.”

“We’re all the same people and movement is something that doesn’t need any division of labels,” said founder and president of American Parkour Mark Toorock, “I try to give access to women particularly, because they have more to overcome to break out of roles that have been assigned to them that they may or may not want for themselves.”

Beast Coast 2016 was presented with the help of three staff members and over 500 volunteer hours. Volunteer Kate Miller coordinates a regular women’s parkour meetup in the D.C. area, and led a women’s session at Beast Coast. “We’re trying to create an access point, a safe space, to feel comfortable to try and do things you might not be good at at first,” she said.

The three-day event also featured a kid’s course, film festival, and seminars, with one titled “Does Your Training Prepare You for Real-Life, Emergency Situations?” (aka a zombie apocalypse). A number of festival goers sported GoPros strapped to their bodies, American Parkour streamed the event live on their Facebook page, and participants were encouraged to share and tag their videos on social media to be incorporated into a longer Beast Coast video.

As for the fashion, I never figured out what’s up with the balloon pants, but I like to believe they have some sort of aerodynamic/parachute-like effects.

American Parkour hosts regular Women’s Parkour Meetups at Gateway and Meridian Hill Parks, as well as classes for beginners, kids, and experienced parkour athletes at American Parkour Academy in D.C.