This week has everything: Slovenian accordion, murder mystery, kombucha, cheese, bonus cheese, vintage board games, Celtic rituals, and queer burlesque. You can’t ask for more, you’re too busy.

MONDAY, APRIL 29

WISTFUL THINKING: What’s better than al fresco dining? Al fresco dining on Iron Gate’s wisteria-laden garden patio for a prix fixe springtime Family Table meal. The Wisteria Family Table meal, premiering tonight, includes antipasti featuring focaccia, wild ramps, goat cheese, honeycomb with charred lemon, a main course with suckling pig porchetta, corzetti pasta, wild greens, and spelt flatbread, and dessert including crispy Greek yeast doughnuts, almond sponge, and orange blossom syrup. Those are just a few of the fantastical sounding dishes offered at this limited-time meal, so if you’re having trouble finding fancy friends with whom to attend, just read your less-fancy friends the whole menu in a low, soft voice until they’re hypnotized into agreeing to go. (Iron Gate, 5:30 p.m.-10 p.m., $59)

WHODUNNIT: If you’re in need of some intrigue, but throwing a murder mystery party sounds like too much work, park it in a theater seat and enjoy opening night of Faction of Fools Theatre Company’s The Great Commedia Hotel Murder Mystery. The show runs about one hour and 40 minutes, which sounds like just enough mystery for a Monday night. This performance will have ASL interpreters. (Gallaudet University’s Eastman Studio Theatre, 7:30 p.m., $12-$22)

WHAT’S IN A NAME: Still salty over Pluto’s planetary status? Be in the room while experts duke it out over what makes a planet a planet. What makes a planet Classical—high cheekbones and a Roman nose? What’s the difference between a Dwarf Planet and a Trans Neptunian Object? Find out at this lecture. (Powell Auditorium, 8 p.m.-11 p.m., FREE with registration)

OG YA: Honor what would’ve been the 90th birthday of one of the most famous young adult writers of all time, Anne Frank, with a moving musical tribute in a stunning setting. The Westminster Williamson Voices will perform Grammy-nominated Annelies, a full-length choral work based on The Diary of Anne Frank, under the baton of the writer and composer James Whitbourn. (The National Cathedral, 7:30 p.m.-9:30 p.m., $18-$48)

MORE: Paper Peony Making (Solid State Books, 6:30 p.m.-9 p.m., $60), Mounted Tropical Plants Workshop (Femme Fatale DC, 7 p.m.-8 p.m., $50-$55), Camp Cope (Black Cat, 7:30 p.m., $15), Monty Python and the Holy Grail Screening (AFI Silver, 5:15 p.m. and 9:20 p.m., $13), Painting the Galaxy (Shop Made In DC, 6 p.m.-9 p.m., $85)

TUESDAY, APRIL 30

SOUNDS LIKE HOLY SPIRIT: Let me paint you a picture: Meditative labyrinth walking. Tibetan singing bowls. Native American flutes. Can you smell the incense? Can you see the linen pants and wide variety of Birkenstocks? Submerge your senses in a mélange of peace and tranquility at this multicultural south bath experience in the heart of the National Cathedral. (The National Cathedral, 6:30 p.m.-8:30 p.m., FREE)

DON’T BALKAN: Slovenia isn’t just home to Melania Trump, it’s also home to renowned accordionist Marko Hatlak. According to the country’s embassy, Hatlak’s playing “is enriched with humorous story-telling, singing, and audience interaction … the listener has the unique opportunity to experience the accordion in all its glory. One moment they are captivated by the energetic melodies and rhythms of the tango, the next they are transported to the corners of the Balkans and its energetic folk music.” Slovenian wine and snacks will be served following the concert, where you can also mix and mingle with Hatlak and Slovenien diplomats—if you’re not too overwhelmed after experiencing the accordion in all its glory. (Embassy of Slovenia, 7 p.m., $30)

KONDON’T BE MESSY: Since watching Marie Kondo on Netflix doesn’t magically clean your home, take the KonMari method into your own hands under the tutelage of certified consultant Jenny Albertini. In this workshop you’ll get a personalized workbook and learn how to apply the concept of decluttering and sparking joy to your finances, career, family, home, and relationships. Please note that you cannot KonMari your roommate or your credit card bill. (The Lemon Collective, 7 p.m.-8:30 p.m., $45)

DO YOU EVEN FERMENT, BRO: Do you buy your kombucha like some kind of commoner who doesn’t know diddly squat about yeast? Don’t embarrass yourself anymore, get cultured at Union Market Test Kitchen and learn everything you need to know about DIY kombucha with local purveyor Craft Kombucha. Your ticket includes all the supplies you need to go home and make your own batch. (Union Market, 6 p.m.-8 p.m., $50)

MORE: Inauguration of the Art Exhibit “The Condor & The Eagle” (The Embassy of Peru, 6 p.m.-8 p.m., FREE with registration) Tehran: City of Love Screening (E Street Cinema, 6 p.m., $14), Drag Trivia (Taqueria Del Barrio, 7:30 p.m., FREE), Pinch Hitters Comedy Showcase (The Pinch, 7:30 p.m., $5)

WEDNESDAY, MAY 1

URSULA MAJOR: German artist Ursula von Rydingsvard, the daughter of a woodcutter, spent the first several years of her life in refugee camps at the end of World War II. Today, The Contour of Feeling, a collection of her large-scale sculptures made of cedar and graphite, is on view at the National Museum of Women in the Arts through July 28th. To better understand the abstract behemoths, some of which take up entire walls, catch a screening of documentary Ursula von Rydingsvard followed by a Q&A and reception with the film’s director and the artist herself. Galleries will be open from 5 p.m.-6:30 p.m. for screening participants. (National Museum of Women in the Arts, 6:30 p.m.-9 p.m., $15)

CELTIC MOODS: Today is May Day, or “Beltane,” the ancient Celtic nature-based day of ritual that marks the halfway point between the Spring Equinox and the Summer Solstice. Traditionally, this was the day that cattle were driven out to their summer pastures, so take some time to drive your emotional cattle out to pasture and welcome a new season. Gather at Femme Fatale DC to “commune with flowers and herbs” and create your very own botanical perfume. (Femme Fatale DC, 6 p.m.-7:30 p.m., $12)

G.O.A.T CHEESE: Via Umbria’s cheese of the month is goat cheese, so take this opportunity to learn about and taste a variety of goat cheeses, including a bonus cheese specially selected by the cheesemonger. The only thing better than cheese is bonus cheese. You’ll also learn how to make dishes featuring each cheese and take home recipe cards to recreate your favorites. (Via Umbria, 7-8:30 p.m., $25)

LET THE OLD GAMES BEGIN: Do you find Cards Against Humanity pedestrian? Do you crave an authentic vintage board game experience? Do you ever wonder, “What would Woodrow Wilson do?” Well you’re in luck, because The Woodrow Wilson House is hosting a vintage game night. Your ticket get you two drinks, entrance to the museum, snacks, and all the old school board games your old soul could desire. If the weather is nice, try your hand at croquet in the garden. (The Woodrow Wilson House, 5:30 p.m.-8 p.m., $15)

MORE: Through The Lens: Saving Africa’s Wildlife with Photographer Brent Stirton (Gilbert H. Grosvenor Auditorium at National Geographic, 7:30 p.m.-9 p.m., $25), Flamenco Dancing and Live Music (L2 Lounge, 7 p.m.-9 p.m., $15), DIY Sustainable Market Bags (Shop Made In DC, 6 p.m.-8 p.m., $79), Pride and Prejudice Screening (West End Cinema, 7:30 p.m., $12.50), Upper Crust Comedy (Pie Shop, 8 p.m., FREE)

THURSDAY, MAY 2

GARDEN HOE: The queer burlesque troupe DC Gurly Show presents Petals and Pasties, a “stripperennial horticultural event.” Spring weather might be the ultimate tease, but the Gurlies will banish the cold for good with their scintillating seduction. (DC Comedy Loft and Bier Baron Tavern, 8 p.m.-11 p.m., $15)

IMMORTAL CACTI: Having one succulent is child’s play. What is this, 2018? Show me a planter full of perennial succulents and I’ll show you a capable adult who not only feeds themselves, but also tenderly keeps a bounty of cacti flourishing. Level up and create your own outdoor planter brimming with succulents. You’ll learn how to keep them alive for years to come while keeping yourself alive with snacks and drinks. (Urban Jungle, 6:30 p.m.-8 p.m., $65)

CUT LUCE: Stop by the Smithsonian American Art Museum’s Luce Foundation Center for Luce Unplugged featuring local band Backbeat Underground. There will be a staff-led talk on artwork chosen by the musicians followed by Backbeat Underground’s energetic, improvised funk performance. Snacks and beverages will be available for purchase, but you can wander the ~3,000 artworks and enjoy the music for free. (Smithsonian American Art Museum, 6:30 p.m., FREE)

ROOMMATE DRAMA: Lucky Plush, a dance-theatre ensemble company based in Chicago, makes its Kennedy Center debut with Rooming House, a dance/theatre whodunnit. Rooming House blends the myth of Orpheus and Eurydice with intimate roommate conversations that seek to determine what makes a person do something that could lead to shattering and irreparable consequences. You’ll giggle. You’ll gasp. You’ll feel fancy as heck because that’s just the magic of The Kennedy Center. (The Kennedy Center Terrace Theatre, 7:30 p.m., $39)

MORE: District Trivia (Capitol Cider House, 8 p.m.-11 p.m., FREE with registration), The DC Moth StorySLAM (The Miracle Theatre, 7:30 p.m., $15), Phillips After 5: Maravillas de America Latina (The Phillips Collection, 5 p.m.-8:30, $12), Thursday Night Jazz Jam with Landon Paddock (Columbia Station, 8:30 p.m.-12 a.m., FREE)