Happy Valentine’s Day!

Jamie Street / Unsplash

Look no further than Valentine’s Day for confirmation that beneath the budget-y exoskeleton of many policy wonks and public servants is an ocean of cheese. It’s the corniest day of the year, to mix food metaphors, and local officials — or, at least, the people who run their social media accounts — are taking full advantage. Don’t read further if you’re not up for some so-bad-they’re-good puns.

The snarkiest government account in business, D.C. Council’s twitter, had nothing but love this morning for followers. (The Council also tweeted this morning about Frederick Douglass’ birthday, which is recognized on February 14, and to tell people to tune in to watch a hearing on a bill to address food insecurity among D.C. seniors.)

D.C. got some love from out of town, too, from Maine Congresswoman Chellie Pingree, a Democrat, who posted this classic statehood valentine. Pingree’s message comes right when the District could use some love: Some House Republicans told The Daily Caller on Friday that they plan to intervene in D.C. local affairs if they win back a majority in the November midterms.

Across the Potomac in Arlington, the Department of Environmental Services appears to be referencing Sunday’s snowy non-event with this punny gem. The department also used the occasion to link residents to information about the county’s snow removal process, which — due to COVID staffing shortages — wasn’t exactly smooth sailing following the big storm in early January.

Some agencies used the holiday as a peg for festive public service announcements. The Prince William County Police Department is showing some love for animal adoption (and pet puns). Just look at that iguana eye contact.

D.C. Fire and EMS remind you to please light your fire responsibly this Valentine’s Day. We assume that’s because they don’t want the job of putting it out.

The Virginia General Assembly is gearing up for a big week: Tomorrow is Crossover Day, when bills that have passed one house move to the other for consideration. The body debated last week over a Republican plan to hold up hundreds of approvals of appointees after Senate Democrats killed ex-Trump EPA Secretary Andrew Wheeler’s nomination to a cabinet post. And have we mentioned masks in schools? Anyway, here’s hoping the nerdy procedural humor in #valegvalentines is healing for everyone down in Richmond.

Also in Virginia, the state’s Teen Democrats are punning with the names of Democrats in the Senate delegation, in yet another feat of Gen Z internet savviness. And they know it, too. “Today is our day to shine. No one can touch us,” the group tweeted. “We take Valentine’s Day very seriously in this house,” tweeted Ethan Lynne, the teenager who got picked on by Gov. Glenn Youngkin’s campaign account last week. But anyway, back to the puns.

Meanwhile, in Montgomery County, the Department of Transportation is getting right to the heart of it: They’re handing out chocolate and other treats for bus riders today.

Speaking of transportation, the Virginia Department of Transportation is taking the opportunity to share some punny road-user wisdom.

(Why is it always transportation Twitter?)

Finally, thank goodness for alt weeklies. A tip of the hat to Washington City Paper for this jumbo thread of hilarious and suggestive D.C. puns.

Keep out-Hallmarking Hallmark, nerds. We love you.

Filed Under: valentines day,