Washington D.C. is now the biggest loser when it comes to cities without major titles.

The Nationals’ second baseman arrived at the Walter E. Washington Convention Center on Saturday looking as if he’d spent the winter as baseball’s answer to Joaquin Phoenix circa 2009.

The “Million Mustache March” brought out about 200 people to lobby the nation’s leaders to grant more political sway to facial hair wearers. A hairy political rally if there ever was one.