All Stories
“I’m just trying to remind myself that you’re not a bitch.”
“The last wedding I went to was a Hinge wedding. The next wedding I’m going to is a Bumble wedding.”
“When I turned 27, I realized, ‘Woah, I’ve got to check myself before I wreck myself.’”
“I’m deep in Navy Yard. I’m basically in Virginia.”
“I’ve got emotions, and Taylor Swift is the happy emotion.”
“You can’t find anything here. I couldn’t find a German advent calendar.”
“I had half a dozen martinis … and then I was teleporting across the city.”
2023 is nearly over and with it came year’s worth of oversharing — often very loud and very publicly — from the general populace of the D.C. region.
“It’s a funeral. Don’t wear shorts.”
“Well, there are a lot easier ways to embezzle money.”
