Now that Tareq Salahi is officially unhitched from ex-wife Michaele, he can focus on his next big project: That run for governor of Virginia.

One of the true American couples is no more.

Even though a judge in Warren County, Va. struck down Tareq Salahi’s lawsuit against Journey guitarist Neal Schon yesterday, the one-time White House gatecrasher isn’t giving up.

Silverdocs begins tonight with a documentary about Journey. The band’s guitarist, Neal Schon, will be in attendance. Does this mean we can count on an appearance by his significant other, White House gatecrasher Michaele Salahi? Don’t stop believin’.

House Majority Leader Eric Cantor (R-Va.) will reportedly endorse Virginia Lt. Gov. Bill Bolling in the gubernatorial race against Attorney General Ken “The Cooch” Cuccinelli.

So what would happen if Sen. Mark Warner (D-Va.) decided to run for the Old Dominion’s governorship and faced White House party crasher Tareq Salahi as his Republican opponent? Warner would easily win—but Salahi would attract more votes than Virginia should be comfortable with.

On Monday, Virginia Attorney General Ken Cuccinelli filed a lawsuit against White House gatecrasher Tareq Salahi, who has responded in the most fameballer way possible: By challenging the Cooch in the 2013 gubernatorial race.

White House party crasher Tareq Salahi is suing ex-wife Michaele for $50 million because she ran off with an aging 1970s rocker that sent him a picture of his private parts. No, really.

Has Michaele Salahi been kidnapped? That’s what her husband says.

It’s really true. Accused White House crashers Tareq and Michaele Salahi have agreed to do a paid personal appearance at the Las Vegas nightclub Pure next week, as Reliable Source first reported early this morning. This is the same way talentless “celebrities” like Paris Hilton or Heidi and Spencer make extra cash. It’s hard to imagine a more perfect confirmation of exactly the sort of people the Salahis are. Though in fairness, it’s even harder…