This marketing abomination to the right here is Kegasus, the, uh, mascot — I guess? — of this May’s Preakness Stakes Infieldfest. For the six of you that are still reading this post, here’s the campaign’s website — which I highly recommend if you want to spend your lunch break gawking at a shirtless, slightly pudgy middle-aged man in a windswept wig encourage you to “be legendary.”