Obviously, crime is no laughing matter. Reading the crime reports included in the Post’s District Extra section can be quite sobering; it’s tough to grasp just how many people come face to face with crime on a daily basis. However, there are times when it’s healthy to chuckle about the minor stuff, so today we bring you Excerpts from a Crime Report. Many thanks to the Post and the MPD.

— MICHIGAN AVE., 600 block, 11:45 p.m. Feb. 11. A male with a knife threatened a female pedestrian on a campus and demanded cash. The pedestrian said she had cash in her dormitory room. The pedestrian went into her residence, and the robber waited outside. An arrest was made.

— 18TH AND L STREETS, 5:45 p.m. Feb. 10. A man, 23, hugged a female acquaintance and refused to let go. The female slapped him. The man fled with keys and a wallet.

— COLUMBIA RD., 1700 block, 4:45 to 7:30 p.m. Feb. 12. Two people attempted to break into a store with a screwdriver. Two people were arrested.

— CONNECTICUT AVE., 5500 block, 8 p.m. Feb. 11 to 5:50 a.m. Feb. 12. Meat was taken from a restaurant entered by drilling a hole in a basement door.

— STEPHENSON PL., 3000 block, 10:24 to 10:50 a.m. Feb. 15. Two pens were taken from a home entered through a dog door in the basement.

— BUTLER ST., 1500 block, 12:30 a.m. Feb. 12. A gunman robbed two people loading a vehicle of purses.

— MASSACHUSETTS AVE., 4200 block, 3 to 3:10 a.m. Feb. 15. Five people entered an apartment through an unlocked door. One left and the others remained. When then the rest left, a resident discovered a music player had been taken.