Guy walks into a studio executive’s office in Hollywood and says, “I’ve got a fantastic idea for a movie. Guaranteed blockbuster.” The executive leans forward in his chair. “Go on,” he says.

“OK, so you take Jackass, cross it with It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World, set it in an urban environment, put lots of young people in funny clothes while pulling shopping carts around the city like sled dogs and drinking at each checkpoint.”

The executive looks skeptical. “Are the young people attractive? Are the clothes skimpy? Can we flirt with nudity and still get a PG-13?”

“Of course.”

“I’m still not sure. I need more of a hook.”

“Well, I haven’t even gotten to the best part. We cast Burt Reynolds as the seasoned veteran cart racer. He’s over the hill, but he hasn’t lost his appetite for the chase of glory, a cold beer, and a hot woman. We get him to go back to the moustache and have him mentor a young racing team of questionable talent. He’ll flirt with the ladies, defy the law, and send the young mayor of the town into apoplectic fits at the incompetence of the police force. In the end, Burt’s team wins, he gets the girl, and he flashes that golden smile into the camera as we fade to black.”

“Sold!”

Quote of the Week

Neighbors gawking at the Idiotarod stop at Solly’s:

Neighbor 1: “What’s going on?”
Neighbor 2: “I don’t know — I think it’s like Cannonball Run for yuppies.”

After the jump, plastic surgery benefactors, giving up willpower for Lent, and smooth thumbs.

Are you familiar with the old medical advice of “use it or lose it”? Well, at overheard, we believe if you don’t use your hearing, you’ll lose it. 9 out of 10 doctors agree that eavesdropping is an excellent way to keep those ears in shape. Send what you hear to overheardindc (at) gmail (dot) com. For your own health.