Photo by sintixerr.

Ah, metrofail. For many, it’s part and parcel of living in the nation’s capital. But what happens when Metro goes above and beyond the usual delays and crowded trains to actually lock people in a station after the system closes for the evening? Well, that’s what happened in the wee hours of Friday morning, leaving a cadre of hard-workin’ folks — at least those who couldn’t squeeze through the gates — stuck in at the Van Dorn station after the station manager believed that the last train of the evening had come through.

It’s not like this hasn’t ever happened before — in fact, upon reading the story, founding DCist editor Mike Grass emailed to remind me of a story we published in 2005 about some Virginians stuck inside U Street one early Sunday morning. It seems like a real pain, although I’m not sure about one of the witnesses’ description of the Van Dorn situation as “a nightmare” which will leave him “scarred for a while,” as he was “held against [his] will.” (Yes, WMATA kidnapped you and forced you to sit there for about a half an hour while they found the right keys. Really, chilling stuff.) [Ed. note: Personally, I’m “scarred” by my “nightmarish” misreading that the passenger in question was female.]

The incident got us to thinking — why not try and make the best of the situation? Here’s some ideas if you ever find yourself locked in a Metro station with some time to kill:

• While you’re down there, how about performing some track maintenance? Metro’s got a tight budget, and if you could tighten a couple of bolts, it’d probably be a big help. Hey, if you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the problem.
• Double check to make sure that any river of kinetic evil energy due to the resurrection of Vigo the Carpathian isn’t bubbling up.
• You could make odds and take bets from fellow passengers on the next D.C. public official to be arrested. (Sorry, in the interest of fairness, Marion Barry has permanently been taken off the board.)
• Impromptu dance party.
• Start thinking about buzzwords which you can use when talking with reporters after the incident, ones which will make you look like as big a martyr as possible. After all, you were inconvenienced for a whole half an hour.

See? Plenty of ways to kill the time.