Photo used under a CreativeAdventures in Craigslist is a new whenever-we-find-something-interesting series in which we dive headfirst into the vast complexities of Washington, D.C.’s Craigslist. Today: robot love.
Here’s an ad from Craigslist’s m4w missed connections that seems totally appropriate, considering that the gentleman in question is only in town for a few days. Who says robots don’t need to get it on?
You: About 7 feet tall, shiny aluminum with a waffle pattern. Being pulled around by some chump of a yellow van. I think it had a tattoo that said “District Taco”.
Me: About 13 foot 6 (32 feet tall when I mean business), chrome grille with flame paint job. Probably protecting that obnoxious kid from the fourth Indiana Jones movie and the rest of the free world. My given name is Optimus, but you can call me Prime, for short.
You smell sweet, like carnitas mixed with a little bit of pico de gallo and heaven. Thinking about you turns my Energon reactor into a two-stroke.
Come roll out with me – there’s more to me than meets the eye.
Freedom is the right of all sentient beings, and you shouldn’t have to deal with funny little men running around inside of you all day. If you want to meet me, I’m blending in with the Megabuses at 11th and H Street. Just remember, fate rarely calls upon us at a moment of our choosing.
I really can’t tell you what the best part of this is, because it’s all so good: the “more to me than meets the eye” pick-up line, the “32 feet tall when I mean business” description, or the fact that Optimus has his eye on District Taco. (What, not taken with the sweet smells of Curbside Cupcakes?) On the topically brilliant scale, I’ll give it eight Cuccinellis.
Spot something crazy/funny/weird on D.C.’s Craigslist? Send it in to tips@dcist.com. (Just, you know, please don’t send us porn.)
