Some unknown bandits apparently took a joyride in a truck containing $200,000 worth of President Barack Obama’s speech gear — including audio equipment, TelePrompters and “several lecterns with the presidential seal” — yesterday. The truck was later found outside a North Carolina hotel, and “no classified or sensitive information was in the vehicle” — so not to worry Emporia, Virginia, you’ll still get the full Obama speech experience.

Sounds like the Commander-in-Chief should start preparing notecards, just in case. Or, if none are available, just use a giant hand.