He’s going to have some more company. (AP Photo/Manuel Balce Ceneta)

Having hatcheted to death their gag of consistently embarrassing Theodore Roosevelt, the Washington Nationals announced that for the 2013 season, the Presidents’ Races in the middle of the fourth inning will add a new competitor.

Only, the Nationals are making us wait until a team convention on Saturday at the Walter E. Washington Convention Center:


After years of forced futility, the Nationals finally staged a race during the final home game of the 2012 regular season in which the mascot version of the 26th president beat out Washington, Jefferson and Lincoln in the daily hobble around the warning track. Then, in the playoffs, Teddy continued to win every race, turning chants of “Let Teddy Win” into “Let Teddy Lose.” Rumors started to fly that in the next season, the Nats would finally mix things up with the addition of a fifth regular character. (A sweater-wearing John F. Kennedy made a one-time appearance in April 2011, mostly to fuck with Teddy.)

Upon hearing the rumor last fall, though, we took it upon ourselves to ask Nationals fans which president the team should add. All U.S. presidents past and present were considered, along with a few fictional favorites, but in the end, Teddy’s cousin, Franklin Delano Roosevelt sped away from the rest of the pack. (For a while, Richard Nixon was the clear favorite.)

We asked the Nationals yesterday who the newest competitor might be, but were rebuffed. “Unfortunately, you’ll have to wait for NatsFest for the big announcement,” Alexandra Schauffler, a spokeswoman for the team, said.

One request, though: No more running jokes with an everyday loser. Please, Nationals promotions team, if you’re adding a fifth president, take it as an opportunity to be creative. Like giving FDR’s wheelchair a jet pack.

Filed Under: franklin d. roosevelt, let teddy lose, presidents races, richard nixon, theodore roosevelt, washington nationals,