Photo by allison_dc

ABIG14U we get. BALLSAC too. But BILL? And BATMAN, CHEF, CANUCK and WOLFPCK? All of these and many more are phrases that are included on a 68-page list of personalized license plates that the D.C. DMV hasn’t and won’t allow. The list was obtained by GovernmentAttic.org via a Freedom of Information request.

Last year we reported that there around just under 4,400 personalized license plates in D.C., everything from BIGSEXY to BRSTLVR (and plenty of very normal options). But for as long as people have tried to come up with clever sayings or identifiers in just seven characters, they’ve also been pushing the envelope as to what the DMV deems appropriate. (Reading through the list will make just about anyone question how intelligent human kind really is.)

According to a 2005 story by WTOP reporter Mark Segraves, D.C. DMV officials have annually rejected any number of proposed license plates, adding to a list that has grown into the thousands. Back then, Segraves reported, the DMV shot down PACKN1, NASTYB, GOPOSTL, XRATED, JACKASS, and GWBUSH. The current list includes BARACK, GAYGUY, 2INHEAT, 1MUFF, and a rather large number of variations on monikers involving parts of male and female genitalia.

City regulations allow the DMV plenty of discretion in deciding which personalized license plates are OK and which aren’t. Anything numbered 1 to 1250 is out; those are specially set aside license plates doled out by the mayor and D.C. Council. Other than that, the DMV can reject anything that is “confusing or offensive to the general public”; that can include any language dealing with “breast, genitalia, pubic area, or buttocks or relate to sexual or eliminatory functions,” mentions or hints of drugs or drug use, just about anything dealing with human characteristics like race or religion, the name of a government agency, or slang terms and abbreviations that would accomplish any of these things.

Still, that doesn’t really explain why DANCE would be turned down, or SENATRS, RELAX, RISOTTO, ITALY, ADANCER, ARSNAL and many others on the list.

Virginia has also prohibited or recalled license plates that invoke violence or coded racist messages, while Maryland’s list of things you can’t put on your license plate exceeds 4,400 proposals.

If you’re in the market for a personalized license plate, check here to see if your option is available. You might want to peruse the list below for the many things that the DMV will likely say no to; if it’s about boobs or balls, maybe you should buy a bumper sticker instead.

Banned License Plates by