President Obama is grateful that he did not have to scream at his staff for falling short of the goal of enrolling 7 million Americans in the ACA this morning (Pete Souza)

President Obama joined a mean-mugging Vice President Biden in the Rose Garden this afternoon to repeat what his press secretary told us this morning: at the close of its first six-month enrollment period, the Affordable Care Act (aka Obamacare) is a success. “Despite several lost weeks out of the gate because of problems with the website, 7.1 million Americans have now signed up for private insurance plans,” said the man who long ago supported creating a single-payer system. “7.1 million. Yep.”

While the open enrollment period is closed and new applicants may have to pay a penalty for enrollment, others who began their applications or were stalled by technical issues will be allowed to continue their enrollment without being penalized. Citizens of the godless, liberty-hating wastelands of California and New York account for nearly one-fifth of the 7.1 million who signed up.

The president’s victory speech concluded a period of time in which he jumped at any opportunity to debase himself in order to promote enrollment, especially with young people, who are believed (by young people) to be invincible and not require health care.

“The law is not perfect,” Obama acknowledged, “But this law is doing what it’s supposed to do….This law is helping missions of Americans and in the coming years it will help millions more.”

Concerning his critics, the president wondered, “Why are folks working so hard for people not to have health insurance? The debate over repealing this law is over….History is not kind to those who would threaten Americans’ economic security.”

Republicans have never much been concerned with History, even if they happen to agree with the president in the present.