Photo by Joe Newman
Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, so check out the archives here.
Kids can be pretty cool sometimes. We’d go see this one’s show.
Overheard of the Week
In the men’s locker room of the William Rumsey Aquatics Center in Eastern Market:
A father and his son of about six are getting ready to go swimming. The boy is singing.
Boy: “I’m looking for chocolate. I’m looking for chocolate. I’m looking for choco. I’m looking for choco. I’m looking for tacos. I’m looking for tacos. I’m looking for tacos. I’m looking for tacos.”
The boy then stops singing and addresses his father in a normal tone of voice. “I need help.”
Father: “With what?”
Boy: “With my song.”
After the jump, idiots, tourists (separately), and sandwiches.
As always, Real, Original Overheard in D.C. relies on you to submit the good stuff to our special Overheard in D.C. email address. Make sure to tell us who, where, and in what context, too.
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In many ways
Two ladies walking out of Union Station at noon on Monday:
Woman 1: “It looks cold out.”
Woman 2: “Oh, this is heaven compared to Cleveland.”
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Judgey McJudgerson
On the blue line Tuesday afternoon:
An elderly lady boards the train and takes her seat while singing gospel hymns the whole time. At the next stop, a young man wearing jeans and a hoodie gets on and sits in front of her. She taps him, and he pulls out one of his ear buds.
Lady: “Do you know your pants are falling off?”
Man: “They don’t feel like they’re falling off. They feel fine.”
Lady: “They look horrible.”
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Getting warmer
On the Blue line going past Arlington Cemetery:
A bunch of field trip kids have luggage and have obviously just gotten off a plane.
Kid 1: “We will drop our stuff at the hotel and then head to that memorial… The one with the flags.”
Kid 2: “They all have flags right? Everything in D.C. has a flag.”
Kid 1: “No the flag, like they are raising a flag.”
Kid 3: “Yeah, Vietnam.”
Kid 2: “No, Bunker Hill.”
Kid 3: “Maybe it was Waterloo?”
Kid 1: “No, I think it was Teddy Roosevelt something.”
Kid 3: “Whatever, it is just some guys sticking a flag in the ground.”
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This would be fascinating
On the Green/Yellow line during the evening commute:
Two female graduate students are talking.
Student 1: “I’m writing my thesis on how politicians apologize after sex scandals. It’s gonna be 30 to 60 pages long. I’m already done with 23.”
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Burn?
On the Metro:
Two fifty-something March for Life attendees are talking.
Man 1: “I only need one book. The Bible. It has the answers to everything.”
Man 2: “Instruction manuals help, too, especially with smart phones.”
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Wise choice
At the 14th & U Circulator stop:
Woman on the phone: “Yeah, he dips his cigarettes in embalming fluid, you know, like they use on deceased people, so I don’t hang out with him, you know what I’m saying?”
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At least you aren’t suddenly a Seahawks fan
In the Gallery Place/Chinatown Metro station:
A young boy: “Dad, can we go to a Wizards game?”
Dad: “No. Remember what I told you? We will never be bandwagon fans.”
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I guess I am sometimes part of this too, who knew?
Leaving CVS on GWU’s campus on Thursday night:
Two undergrad GW women are looking at a bottle of shampoo.
Girl 1: “It has been so long since I’ve washed my hair.”
Girl 2: “I know that lifestyle.”
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The one at Harry’s downtown is pretty tasty
Friday night at Open City in Woodley Park:
Server to her manager: “Are adults allowed to order the kids’ menu grilled cheese?”
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This is a good debate: the more accurate you get, the more pretentious you sound
Morning on the Red line:
A group of teenagers en route to school are discussing French class.
Teenage boy: “I know how to say ‘croissant’ in French. It’s ‘croissant’!”
Teenage girl (rolling eyes): “Dude, you said that sooooo White. Like ‘cruh-sahnt.'”
