Want to eat a fried Oreo, ride a mechanical bull, milk a cow, and bid in a cake auction, all in the same day? Of course you do, you gluttonous, thrill-seeking creature.

The D.C. region is home to many a summer fair, and each one has its own special blend of rides, music, food, and agricultural contests. Here’s our list of highlights, organized by fair start date.

To cheer on racing farm animals…

Head to the Howard County Fair in West Friendship, about an hour north of Washington. Fairgoers can root for their favorite pig at the Hogway Speedway every day at noon, 3 p.m., 6 p.m., and 8 p.m. If pigs aren’t your thing, you’re in luck—there are also racing goats and ducks.

The Howard County Fair runs from August 3-10 in West Friendship.

For that classic carnival ride experience…

Buy some ride tickets for the Montgomery County Agricultural Fair. Little kids can enjoy a merry-go-round, a circus-themed train ride, or something called the Wiggle Wurm. For adults, there’s about a half dozen spinning, whirling rides that’ll make you instantly regret that second fried Snickers bar. Take your pick from Cliff Hanger, F5, Khaos, Zero Gravity, and Vertigo, or just watch your friends from the comfort of the ground.

The fair runs from August 9-17 at the Montgomery County Agricultural Fairgrounds in Gaithersburg.

To judge some human babies…

Make your way to the Prince William County Fair, Virginia’s largest fair. Think you have a cute baby? On August 10 and 11, you can pay an entry fee of $5 for the chance to let strangers judge your baby’s attractiveness. The winner of the 70th annual Prince William County Fair Baby Contest will go home with a ribbon, ceremonial cup, and $30, though all contestants will receive a ribbon.

The Prince William County Fair runs from August 9-17 at the Prince William County Fairgrounds in Manassas.

To finally try goat yoga…

Squeeze into some spandex and head to the Arlington County Fair. For the first time this year, the fair will feature kid-friendly yoga classes featuring baby goats from Walnut Creek Farm in Salem, Virginia. The goats are “curious and interested in climbing and interacting with people,” according to the fair’s website. The fair itself is free, but the hour-long yoga classes cost $40.

The Arlington County Fair runs from August 14-18 at the Thomas Jefferson Community Center in Arlington. Goat yoga takes place on Saturday, August 17.

To show off your most excellent livestock…

Pick out your best goat, pig, cow or sheep and head to the Prince George’s County Fair. Though most fairs on this list have similar livestock contests, Prince George’s has the distinction of being the longest running in Maryland—the fair started in 1842.

The Prince George’s County Fair runs from September 5-8 at Show Place Arena in Upper Marlboro.

For an excuse to dress up your pet…

Take little Fido to the D.C. State Fair for the annual Pet Parade. Animals on leashes, in cages, in tanks or in aquariums are invited to attend, as long as their owners can carry them. Prizes will be handed out in categories including Best Pet Costume, Best Pet And Owner Duo, and Owner/Pet Lookalike.

The D.C. State Fair takes place on September 8 at Gateway DC at the old St. Elizabeth’s campus in Southeast D.C.

To watch a real coronation…

Make your way to the Charles County Fair to meet the future Queen Nicotina, a name that hearkens back to the county’s tobacco-growing roots. Want to be queen yourself? You must be an unmarried Charles County high school school senior. Contestants are judged based on scholastic achievement, extra-curricular activities, poise and appearance, a personal interview, and presentation.

The fair takes place from September 12-15 at the Charles County Fairgrounds in La Plata.

To see some Motown legends…

Get your tickets to the Great Frederick Fair. This year’s event will feature Americana, country, and Christian rock concerts. The Temptations (albeit with just one member from the original group) will perform on September 17, marking the fair’s first-ever Motown gig.

The Great Frederick Fair runs from September 13-21 at the Frederick Fairgrounds.