See some real hot dogs

If you free associate some Oktoberfest-adjacent words, eventually you get the Weiner 500, a.k.a. the annual race of the dachshunds. Registration for tiny, fleet-footed racers has already closed, but there’s room to spectate at The Wharf, along with German beer and food for purchase, live music, and a stein hoisting competition. Does your dog dream of crossing that finish line in glory, even if he or she isn’t a dachshund? All pups are welcome to watch the race, or be forced into a costume contest by their owners. The Humane Rescue Alliance will also be on hand with adoptable pooches.
District Wharf, Saturday, 1 p.m.-5 p.m.

Parking life

Bad news: There’s going to be nearly three dozen fewer available parking spots in D.C. today. Good news: There’s going to be nearly three dozen more parks in D.C. today, thanks to the annual PARK(ing) Day, a D.C. Department of Transportation-sponsored, citywide effort that transforms parking spaces into teeny tiny oases for one day. One park in NoMa will have a real pool, another will host a garden with plant-your-own seedlings. If you’re going to visit, maybe public transit is the best way to get there.
Various locations, Friday, through 4 p.m.

Suddenly, Seymour (is calling)

Performance artist Brian Feldman—who has previously made art out of dishwashing, Hanukkah celebrations, and hours of impromptu friendship—is resurrecting his musical-by-phone series with Little Phone of Horrors. Like his previous shows Rent This Phone and Fiddler on the Phone, Feldman will receive 19 calls at a prescribed time, and will answer them by performing a short musical theater selection, this time from the 1982 comedy Little Shop of Horrors. Feldman will play multiple parts, and will perform them in the order in which he receives the calls (that means no requests). Calls will range in length from 25 seconds to five minutes. He’ll be receiving the calls, appropriately enough, from Shaw plant shop REWILD: Call 202-981-6552 to catch the show. (And if you’re looking for a more traditional Little Shop experience, Constellation Theatre Company is putting on a stage production of the show next month.)
202-981-6552, Saturday, 7:30 p.m.-9:30 p.m.

Say goodbye to a famous goblin

OK, so Untitled (Big Man), the gloriously grumpy statue of a scowling, naked giant at the Hirshhorn, isn’t exactly a goblin (we think?). Still, there’s something about him—his size, his melancholy—that could fit right in with the goblins of Labyrinth, the cult classic film about a teenager who must rescue her little brother from a stylish goblin king, played by David Bowie. Artist Ron Mueck, who created Big Man, also provided voice work for Labyrinth, and was a collaborator of director Jim Henson’s. The Hirshhorn will screen the film on Sunday in honor of Big Man, which is being temporarily moved out from its longtime spot at the top of the museum’s escalator.
Hirshhorn Museum and Sculpture Garden, Sunday, 2 p.m.-4 p.m.

Green trade

Remember when everyone was Marie Kondo-ing everything, getting rid of the things that no longer gave them joy? If one of the things that’s no longer giving you joy is the plant that just won’t grow, no matter which window you stick it in, consider re-homing it at this weekend’s plant swap at the National Arboretum. Washington Gardener Magazine is organizing the affair, and houseplants, cuttings, vegetables, shrubs, trees, seeds, and more are welcome—though invasive species are not (try native plants!) Organizers warn that participants should come ready to swap promptly: Apparently the bloodlust (dirtlust?) is real at these plant swaps.
National Arboretum, Sunday, 2 p.m.-3 p.m.

Want more ideas for your weekend—even if they cost a little money?

10 Things To Do Around D.C. This Weekend
10 Food And Drink Events To Feast On This Week
12 Concerts You Won’t Want To Miss This Week