If last month’s bouts were nail-biters, the spectators of this past Saturday’s thrillers will have left the Armory with bloody stumps for fingers.

If you weren’t at the D.C. Armory on Saturday for the D.C. Rollergirls’ fourth bout of the season, you missed a couple of real nail-biters.

The U.S. military says it’s using a 60-by-40-foot map on the floor of the D.C. Armory to prepare for the inauguration, but we know what’s really up: we’re readying for an invasion of giants.