As you know, DCist likes to let the cat out of the bag. We’re constantly searching for ways to spread the word far and wide, from Fairfax to Frederick, soup to nuts. We also have a penchant for really screwing over a particular archetype: The Superfan. You know the type; they’re the people who spend day and night toiling to sign up for e-mail lists comprised of mere tens of thousands of other superfans. They have worn the ink off of their F5 keys reloading websites for the first news of ticket presales. They wear pithy screen-printed t-shirts and dare you to resist their sarcasm. They’re pissed, but mostly just at us.

We can’t stop ourselves, though; we have to do it again. We don’t know if you’ve heard, since it’s been on the d.l., but there’s this thing going down tomorrow night. It’s called “Powerball,” and it’s secretly sweeping the nation. Sorry to your Powerball superfans out there, but we have a duty to our readers.

Powerball is the hipster lottery of the future. If you’re the lucky one to win $365 million, you can afford all the Pumas and square-rimmed glasses you could ever want! You could literally donate millions to several charities. We’re playing, and we think you should too.

Powerball tickets are on sale for the big jackpot drawing tomorrow night. The hippest of D.C.’s hip have already been lining up at liquor stores across the District to get them. Buy some before 10:59 p.m. tomorrow, and you too could have a chance to win. You Marylanders and Virginians can’t play unless you come to the Federal City, and we hope that you do. We say damn the consequences! We expect the usual volley of complaints from the superfans saying we’re hurting their chances of winning. We expect to be threatened with legal action for revealing this “secret” information. We don’t care. We love information, and information wants to be free. Do you hear us? Free!!

Image, from flickr user Markybon, used under a Creative Commons license.