Public agencies are not generally known for their efficiency and oversight. Whether it’s the D.C. police, the public school system, or Congress itself, this kind of criticism has dogged just about every agency out there. While Metro has not been an exception to this trend, it seems they have things covered when it comes to potty privileges.

DCist Tom snapped this picture of the rules and regulations governing use of Metro’s various johns, posted in McPherson Square. Metro seems to think it warrants a special order with eight full subsections to let us know exactly how to go about using the loo. You can make out most of the lengthy text in this larger shot.

As you can see, the restrictions on who can use Metro’s Roman tea rooms and who cannot are pretty strict:

31.2 The circumstances under which the restroom will be made available are:
A. In an emergency situation
B. For children
C. For customers who are elderly or physically disabled

Even if you are one of the select few qualified to drop your drawers in Metro’s little fortresses of solitude, you’d better prepare for some company.

31.3 The Station Manager must escort the customer to the ancillary hallway where the restroom is located and direct him/her to the Customer’s Restroom, then return to normal duties. Customers will be allowed to exit the restroom, without the Station Manager’s assistance, through the ancillary hallway door. After the customer exits the hallway, the Station Manager shall ensure that the ancillary hallway door is secured.

Anyone else feel like we’re back in 4th grade all over again?