Washington has had a love-hate relationship with the Segway for some time now. Certainly, they are useful modes of transportation — who among us begrudges the UPS man, or even the tourists, from trying to zip around our city’s streets in a more efficient manner? But at the same time, pretty much no matter what you do, if you’re riding one, you look like a douchebag. This isn’t to say the technology isn’t cool, or that we all don’t secretly want to try riding one, just that it’s undeniable that it is impossible to look cool wearing a helmet and pressing lightly forward on as you roll silently forward on these contraptions.

Today the local media is awash in the news that the Metropolitan Police Department is adding 25 Segways to its neighborhood patrols, with ten more on the way. The Associated Press takes a respectful tone, acknowledging that police are hoping that the vehicles will help officers cover more ground while maintaining good relations and visibility in communities. If we had a nickel for every time a DCist commenter complained that D.C. police never get out of their squad cars and patrol on the sidewalks, we would be the wealthiest blog in the land. So should the Segway program prove to be a success, surely District residents would greet this development with shouts of approval. But the Post acknowledges the inherent humor involved with their headline, “Go Ahead, Chuckle.” We may be glad to have more police out of their cars, but that doesn’t mean we won’t laugh at them.

Yet to be determined is where the D.C. Segway cops fall on the Embarassment Scale. Motorcycle cops are clearly the coolest, with those in squad cars a close second, but what about mounted police? Are Segway cops more or less geeky than bicycle cops? We suppose we’ll just have to wait until we spy one for ourselves to decide.

Photo of a Chicago Segway cop by Flickr user mbiddulph, used under a creative commons license